The Bearded Clam Strikes Back

Benjamin Bernanke stands up and stretches, after a long night sleeping on an old French colonial chair, prattling to himself over a philly blunt filled with A grade marijuana “I’m gonna get those bitches soon, real soon.”

He stares into a mirror and pulls out a small comb and grooms his beard to look perfect. He walks over to his 20 foot window and lifts up the Roman shade adorning it, revealing the sun rising on the horizon. Slowly, he pulled a pipe out of his pocket, filled to the brim with aromatic tobacco, and lights it. He then walks over to his desk and turns on his computer, browsing over some numbers and graphs, then turns it off.

As he walks out of his office with conviction and purpose, with a trail of pipe smoke in his path, he mutters to himself “I’m gonna get those bitches right now.”

(slams door)

NOTE: Either Tom Green or HELMUT BAKAITIS (the fucking architect from The Matrix) will play Ben Bernanke in my upcoming movie: 10 Trillion Ways to Die, Choose One

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8K-g7ipAqYY

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15 comments

18 Responses to The Bearded Clam Strikes Back

charlie says:

Yes, yes, coal is flying to the moon today. And by June next year it will be MUCH higher. Acquire it whenever and you will win. But do not let the immediate coal rush forget what holiday is quickly approaching the broad markets.

Reply
TradingProdigy says:

President “Bobby”: Mr. Gardner, do you agree with Ben, or do you think that we can stimulate growth through temporary incentives?
[Long pause]
Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.
President “Bobby”: In the garden.
Chance the Gardener: Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.
President “Bobby”: Spring and summer.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
President “Bobby”: Then fall and winter.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
Benjamin Rand: I think what our insightful young friend is saying is that we welcome the inevitable seasons of nature, but we’re upset by the seasons of our economy.
Chance the Gardener: Yes! There will be growth in the spring!
Benjamin Rand: Hmm!
Chance the Gardener: Hmm!
President “Bobby”: Hm. Well, Mr. Gardner, I must admit that is one of the most refreshing and optimistic statements I’ve heard in a very, very long time.
[Benjamin Rand applauds]
President “Bobby”: I admire your good, solid sense. That’s precisely what we lack on Capitol Hill.

Reply

This is the Matrix..that is why I love it so. OK, Oil EIA was actually .1 million billion more then the way big build coming out of API last night, Oil needs to fade. Spainish 10 years are down, lol, after a Spainish Downgrade…they are so hoping they will ask for bailout, but imho they won’t until Oct 21, and maybe not even then. Their Bonds are getting to silly low and should move up. Can’t see any reason for the market to be bullish today. Hi Fly.

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