iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,461 Blog Posts

The Greatest Thing in the History of the World

I am sick of talking about stocks. Stock this, stock that. You are wrong. You are right. Fuck on, fuck off and sing a song for Charlie; I could care less about your exploits.

I’m also sick of talking about “the blog.” Fuck the blog and how “cool it is.” In actuality, there is NOTHING remotely cool about writing for a blog. Whenever I tell people in “real life,” they just sort of look at me, as if I was some sort of internet weirdo. My reply, as always, “please visit my site, so that I can steal your identity and buy hamburgers with your credit cards.”

Most of you come to “Fly’s Blog” for a good laugh. But, unbeknownst to you, it is I who laughs at you. The more people who log on, the better—more laughs for me.

Okay, let’s talk about stocks:

They’re gonna go down. Sell everything, else get raped by a clown. WRONG. We’re “scud missiling” higher, taking all of the Death Merchants with us. Nah, just kidding.

For real, DEATH MERCHANTS will be knocking on your door shortly.

What’s fascinating about this post, which happens to be about nothing at all, is that you are stuck reading it, like a dog licking peanut butter. The art of nothingness can only be revealed by those who perpetuate a “plant-like” existence.

Since young, I’ve been known to win a lot, dating back to my MVP days in little league. I’m going through life with the help endless handicaps. For example: the market can go down 10% tomorrow, sending me to my local mental ward, level IV. However, within a week, I will be able to talk my way out of the rubber room and recapture all lost coin, and more!

I find no need to rush stock trades. It helps—a great deal— knowing that there is nothing the market can do to keep me down for more than 2 weeks. No matter the set back, I find a way.

Speaking of which, The Greatest Thing in the History of the World is taking a bowling ball and throwing it down Wall Street, knocking you fucking pikers into the dirty puddles—fucking up your bullshit “Men’s Warehouse” loser suits. You might as well wear a tuxedo to work. That’s how ridiculous you look.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsDtU9eHG5E&feature=PlayList&p=1213BDEC4BB78D53&index=6 550 400] If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

59 comments

  1. MOOBER

    Drinking and watching Lost?

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  2. Awake

    Fly’s on some good shit right now, the kind of stuff that either makes you write groundbreaking novels or wake up naked next to a half eaten deer carcass

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  3. Redshark

    Fly,

    Leave my Men’s Warehouse suit out of this please as I am trying to enjoy the peanut butter.

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  4. mama

    “You been playing the market behind Mama’s back?” I’m waiting it out, impatiently. The Fly is generally right and until the market shows its hand buying more shit or trimming some loses is pointless.

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  5. masterpain

    write a blog call yourself FLY . Not a wierdo…its normal…isnt it?

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  6. Goldie

    We don’t knock. We blow the fucking doors in.

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  7. The Fly

    I did not call myself Fly. I was ordained with it. It is a curse.

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  8. ottnott

    I can’t believe you are still trying to milk that MVP, especially given that you were juiced at the time.

    No offense to Juice.

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  9. j

    Fly…. ummm what the fuck is this thread all about? I just don’t get even the sublimbabal (How bush says it) message.

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  10. Pete

    Youare the best blogger, and the only one I read religously.

    You have the gift of gab.

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  11. The Contractor

    There is nothing funny about clown rape.

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  12. The Fly

    True. Nothing funny about clowns at all.

    J

    You live a plant-like existence. Might I pour a glass of water over your head? You might like it.

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  13. seriously, you’re bragging about little league mvp????????????? who wasn’t, they hand out trophies to retards at that level……… what about high school – all- state??????? college – d-1???????????? i started d-1 f-ball and when i entered the work force i felt obliged to sign up for the company teams………. the captain had the nerve to tell me how good they were and other b.s……… upon destroying the comp, said captain at least had the balls to say “man, you are way out of our league. you’re on a different level.”….. just saying – know your role……….

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  14. Damon

    Doctor Fly:

    But “masterpain” will tell you how you can’t talk about ANYTHING BUT STOCKS on YOUR blog, my friend.

    Master-pain-in-the-ass…

    It’s all good.

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  15. Coach Cawffee

    Don’t get me started, losers.

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  16. TradeItIn

    Fly,

    This posts reeks of “drama queen.” Sack up man…

    Post about making money or go bake some cookies, your choice.

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  17. charlie

    Sing pikers, SING!

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  18. Liver Jessemore
    Liver Jessemore

    If I had a hammer…I’d hammer in the morning…

    I’d hammer in the evening…

    All over this land !!!

    ————-

    There…dammit…I said it !!!

    .

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  19. chivasontherocks
    chivasontherocks

    when in little league, what position did you play?

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  20. gulp

    so you know about all the transexual porn? damn. to hell with the credit cards.

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  21. The Fly

    I was a pitcher/ss varsiy HS until a rotator cuff incident.

    Tradeloser:

    Talk about making money? PFFFFFFFFFFFFF. That’s all i do. I am bored of talking to you clowns.

    Go read one of the many blogs that copy me and fuck off.

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  22. Hammy

    wow… the rare in-post youtube video.

    George H is on the linoleum floor with a plastic bottle of wine tonight

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  23. Taco

    Somebody’s choice picks choked on hairy nads today.

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  24. The Fly

    Your mother licks my guacamole.

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  25. Damon

    A late night thought..

    Besides drinking heavily, and enjoying his great love of extremely large bill fish, Ernest Hemingway greatly enjoyed his menagerie of six-toed cats in Key West, Florida.

    I’d like to breed my Palm Desert, post-feral bitch of an alley cat, with a Hemingway descended six toed feline.

    I digress, MGM took a huge dump today. Before last night, it took elephant balls to make a short commitment in this market.

    For the love of god….

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  26. The Man

    So, I’ve been reading this blog for a couple years? I think.
    I’ll tell people to check it out. This guy’s on top of the market in the short-term. I tell them, I follow Jim Rogers for long-term stuff & The Fly for day to day insights and Jack Miller for residential real estate.
    They say, “The Fly”? What’s his name? Who is he?
    I say, I don’t know. He writes a blog. He says he’s a 30’s NY broker guy & I believe it. Trust me, this guy knows his stuff. The shit he writes comes true, more often than not.
    They say, you don’t know who this guy is…
    They think, you’re crazy to pay attention to someone you don’t even know.
    I think, ok. Don’t fucking read it. See if I care. I’m not telling you shit anymore.
    I also rec’ed the blog for some Texas bible bangers. I said, disregard the language, the content is great. They must have checked it out. I never heard back from them – they couldn’t disregard the language.
    So, the/my point – keep up the good work. It’s appreciated.

    good song, bad video: (don’t listen to the 2nd 1)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooelrbOluFU&feature=related

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  27. The Fly

    Thanks

    Tell them I am GEORGE HAMILTON, Magician extraordinaire.

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  28. F-ing Loser

    Fly,

    A little sensitive tonight, aren’t we?

    .

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  29. ottnott

    Bad time to be George Hamilton. The SEC (they still exist?) has declared war on Orange Americans. You might get hit by a spitball.
    http://www.cnbc.com/id/30729475

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  30. The Fly

    Sensitive? Not in the slightest. Would you like a site-wide ban?

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  31. ZMoose12

    Fly, come on man… Baseball? Gotta get with a real sport like Lacrosse 😉

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  32. F-ing Loser

    Fly,

    No, I don’t want to be banned. I have been reading/enjoying your writing for years now.

    That said I do like the freedoms of the “Internets” to F with you.

    Ban me if you must but I really hope you don’t.

    Best regards,

    F

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  33. ottnott

    I’m still shaking my head and smiling over the glass of water thing. Took me an extra half heartbeat to get it. Time to go to bed.

    That’s one of the downsides of being human instead of being one of the undead who stalks the internet by night, trades stocks by day, and tapes old radios together in the twilight zone.

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  34. The Fly

    i only asked a question.

    i ban no one. I have a squad for that.

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  35. ottnott

    That would make The Fly the man on the right.

    Bed. Really headed there now.

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  36. F-ing Loser

    🙂

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  37. dave

    They are still going down hard tomorrow.

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  38. The Equalizer

    You Know You’ve Been Trading Too Long When:

    …you LOL at the line about Men’s Wearhouse suits, but you check the chart of MW just in case that wacky theory correlating recessions with sales of cheap suits instead of casual Friday wear holds water.

    It’s been a vodka and Irn Bru night for me, but thanks for making me smile as though it were vintage port and Stilton. Futures are flat, and I will sleep well, even if we send in the clowns tomorrow morning.

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  39. Anton Cigur

    Great post!

    I mean it sucked.

    Seriously, just kidding.

    Everything I say is a lie, and that’s the truth.

    Honestly, great post.

    And I mean that.

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  40. The Fly

    …and so is your…

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  41. Anton Cigur

    Damn, Petey, go to bed.

    (Sorry for the rough language.)

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  42. Quiet Storm

    Zmoose- what are you talking about, Baseball is a true gentlemen game. Lacrosse is for closet homos who like to bang their sticks against guys.

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  43. Slim

    It’s “couldn’t care less”, not “could care less”.

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  44. mrkcbill

    Fly…Time to go public with your identity. I see Barry R. is having some kind of Rock Concert/Financial Newsapoolooza ….with Dylan Ratigan and a bunch of other homo’s….asking $895 per for a day. Shit I wouldn’t give #9 $895.

    I don’t feel a need to recommend this site to anybody. Let the retards find it themselves. Organic is always the best growth.

    I own a couple of Mens’s W. suits. Fucker. *****

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  45. Fly's Little League Baseball Coach
    Fly's Little League Baseball Coach

    Touch it….

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  46. Henry Fool

    I’m done for a while with this here blog. I’ll read here and there of course, but I will waste no more time contributing my toxic drivel, nor my artistic renderings branded by the iBankCoin logo, that you may or may not enjoy. ex. Bloody dagger, Anniversary cake, and dozens more. All pro bono mind you! It really is just a thankless vacuum of degenerate swine goat fuckers that frequent the area. It is all complete without my contribution.

    Henry Fool bids you all a fond farwell. Especially you WTF you faceless halfwit tool.

    The last post from Henry Fool!

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  47. Adam Lambert, Cross-Dressing American Idol
    Adam Lambert, Cross-Dressing American Idol

    Acually, it’s MEN WEAR HOSE. I love it there!

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  48. The Fly

    Good riddance. Your pictures will be missed.

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  49. DMG

    “Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach a man to create an artificial shortage of fish and he will eat steak.”

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  50. Richy

    I for one greatly appreciate the input of Chivas, The Artist, Henry, The Prof, Anton, Gapping, Omfgitsjd, Maelstrom and all the tabbed bloggers.
    Its a sad day if they are hounded out by the few illiterate cock-smoking ballbag trolls who come here to cause trouble.
    Ignore those wankers Henry!

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  51. JakeGint

    Henry, I’m disappointed you let some heckling piker put you off your game.

    Know this: when you get heckled here, it’s a sign you’ve “arrived.”

    Look at the #1 Hecklee for proof. Do you see him packing up and leaving every time one of his calls is questioned?

    My advice: Take a page from his book and learn to tell people to fornicate with horned herbivores.

    _______________

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  52. JakeGint

    And now, an announcement that actually FITS this blog post’s title:

    The Greatest Thing in the History of the World.

    ______

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  53. Marvin

    Henry…are you really pissed…or do you just need your diaper changed?

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  54. TheArtist

    Henry, come back, you’re the man…

    on other topics,
    just announced today on Yahoo financial news,
    New jobless claims rise more than expected- AP Wal-Mart reports flat Q1 profit, meets expectations- AP Wall Street set for modestly lower open- AP Sony reports $1 bln annual loss, first in 14 years- AP Europe edges up, Asia down after US data- AP Oil falls below $57 as US recovery hopes wane- AP Sanyo reports loss but sees profit this year- AP BT posts huge 4Q loss, to cut 15,000 more jobs- AP Kohl’s 1st-quarter profit drops 11 percent-

    these are the headlines copied and pasted.

    ???

    yeh, all looks rosie and peachy with the economy from these headline, buy long and hold………..not!

    looks like to me a few traders woke up and saw the dim light up the road?

    O, and don’t forget about the thousands of dealerships (and the familes that own them, with kids, grandkids they hoped one day would take over the business) that by next week will be stripped of their livelihood.

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  55. Henry Fool

    Fuck it I’ll shoot Fly Pics cause he’s the man and It’s fun.

    But like the Fly said “Good riddance”. I’m too busy getting rich to share or brag anymore.
    Fuck this running diatribe. Honestly I don’t know how the Fly deals.

    Please blame WTF directly for this. Just for yucks!

    Later

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  56. WTF

    He’s baaaaaaack. Just when I thought that I ran Henry-The-Metamucil-Fool off the board with one simple post, he slinks back. I guess we’ll all be subjected to the details of the old turd’s toilet habits on a daily basis. Merde!

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  57. JakeGint

    WTF –

    You evil, evil man. Who will you run off next with your scathing bathroom activity japes?

    __________

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