IMPOSSIBLE TO REMEDY

The Lord knows that I try to get through to many of you, thick skulled primates dressed in working attire. For the life of me I don’t know how many of you function. I imagine that your housing tenements are roach infested havens for rats and other vermin. The internet is a place where you go to write graffiti, throw a few farts, then leave. Well, let me remind you, I am publishing literature here that will be viewed for centuries. I will outlive you all. Through the immortality of the pen, I will vanquish my enemies with great spite and spin them atop giant needles rooted in the ground.

You’re all very obsessed with the price of things, are you not? You affix artificial time horizons to ideas that do not make sense in the first place. One of you heathens mocked my YELP sale yesterday. I bet you’re not mocking me today.

Investing, like all important things in life, is an art form. There are few certainties, aside from the renowned PPT oversold signal, and most of you are throwing whiffled balls into the wind.

You’re all waiting for the Federal Reserve chief, very much interested in what he has to say. You will respond to his words immediately, then forget all about it tomorrow, as if he said nothing at all. Your brains can fit inside of my rubics cube.

Try to mock me for being a supporter of shipping vessels, an industry rich with history and tradition. Feel free to make uninformed guesses and post them into the comments section of this site. I very much appreciate the richness of your idiotic banter.

I was going to post some crazy comments that I’ve been reading in a Reddit forum for Bitcoins. But then I got lazy and figured it wasn’t worth my time to do so. College kids are putting tuition money into Bitcoin, using credit cards, blowing up fast, then staying up all night, lamenting the very idea that Bitcoin was founded on.

You must understand something: Bitcoin is an illusion. It is fiat currency without the US military to back it. It is all sentiment, zero substance, and will be worthless once people lose faith in the idea that it can serve as a viable pyramid scheme.

Let’s be clear: the only reason why people are buying/mining for Bitcoins is for profit, not to store value. That is the discernable difference between guys who have gold bars buried in their backyards and idiots who have six figures of Bitcoins on their hard drives.

The latest set back has been delivered in the form of a Chinese ban on the illusionary currency.

The price has been halved over the past day or two.

Providing the Fed doesn’t throw the market into a blackhole today and the market remains relatively calm, there is a better than average chance that stocks with thin floats, good technicals, and a large percentage of shares sold short can squeeze higher, in an effort to inflict “max pain” upon the skulls of short sellers.

I am looking for stocks that have a good technical rating, up for the day, and has more than 25% of its float sold short and has less than 20 million shares in its float. Once the squeeze gets going, it will be almost impossible to stop it.

Just 5 names were produced (this can change on a minute by minute basis, depending on current share price). Here is The PPT screen that produces the results.

MEG

PBF

RBCN (one of my top holdings)

YRCW

SODA

Do you really believe Dr. Benjamin Bernanke is going to slow down on his asset buying frenzy one week before pagan X-mas? Do you believe the Federal Reserve will reduce government tax receipts by causing the market to trade lower, two weeks before the year ends? Wouldn’t it be preferable, from a practical stand-point, to vampire as many capital gains as humanly possible, then taper in early 2014?

This whole taper business is absurd, something that is best negotiated in a roomful of morons, persons unable to eat food with utensils.

The economy is better. We don’t need the Fed to buy assets. We have Blackstone and Goldman Sachs to do that.

At any rate, TAPERMANIA continues.

I just bumped into this film on Youtube. I first saw it back in the 90’s (I believe during its CNBC debut), living in my basement apartment, disheveled, but hungry for the Wall Street dream. This movie certainly helped motivate me, as it romanticized the savagery that is high finance.

After I saw this movie, I read “The Money Machine” to get a better idea what KKR was all about. I highly recommend grabbing a copy of that book. It’s a page burner.

Enjoy the film.

BALT is not yours, for it is mine. Whatever position that you might have in it, long or short, is fleeting and will pass with your gas, as you scavenger on to other things. Opinions aren’t needed, trust in that.

It’s true, I’ve purchased even MOAR BALT today and might buy more again tomorrow. It’s just what I do. There are other stocks that could be purchased, like ANGI, WUBA or LITB, but I choose BALT.

Treu pirates do not fret at the sight of an injured frigate–they annihilate it and capture its bounty.

Before this conversation is said and done, I shall capture your bounty–trust in that.

I started a new position in $OWW and added to $BALT sub $5.30.

I sold some of my largest positions in order to mix things up a bit. For now, the proceeds are in cash.

This was an easy one. Some years the Asshat award is deliberated, mulled over for weeks amidst cigar smoke filled rooms strewn with supporting documents for prospective candidates. However, in the year of our Lord 2013, Bill Ackman stole the show, without a contest.

It was an especially  humiliating year for Bill, due to two of his high profile positions, long JCP, short HLF, continuously punching him in the proverbial face, with special thanks to Carl Icahn. With Ackman’s support, Ron Johnson, ex CEO of JCP, nearly destroyed the century plus old retailer in little less than a year, seeing its share price carved in half, then carved in half, yet again. Following Ackman’s infamous “XMAS PUMP” of 2012, shares of HLF pretty much tripled in 2013, taking hundreds of millions of Bill’s money in the process.

At the same time, Carl Icahn played antagonist and destroyer to Bill’s credentials as a top shelf money manager, firmly placing Pershing Square into “Camp LAMBDA, LAMBDA, LAMBDA“, selling cream pies with Darth Vader helmets on.

Maybe Bill and co are working on some special “aero-dynamically” superior javelins  and will take revenge upon Carl and other jocks in 2014. However, until that day comes, he will remain an Asshat, forever remembered as the guy who blew up on the centre stage, losing to a 150 year old guy in a vitamin stock, wearing Joe Fresh shorts and stealing away coupons from senior citizens.

Congrats to “Montauk Bil” Ackman.

A few years back I demonstrated, using a spec account, how I used The PPT‘s algorithms in trading a $100k account into a million, in less than a year. I was using leverage, options, and 3x ETFs. Truth be told, I haven’t been trading ETFs in more than a year, for reasons unbeknownst to me.

2013 has been a great year for the buy and hold types. But it’s not always gonna be this easy. The very best part of The PPT is the Hybrid Oversold signal. To sum it up in layman’s terms, the oversold/overbought signals measure stress points and predicts areas of exact inflection– using fundamentals, technicals, bonds, forex and commodity inputs. The scores are processed and a reading is given, using history as a reference point. My theory, from the beginning, was that markets always behave in the same manner. The bubbles and swoons might have different labels, but the price action is the same. I’ve proven this to be true, at an 80% accuracy rate, ever since we launched The PPT in 2008.

Using only the Hybrid OS signal, TNA as a vehicle, and a holding period of 10 days, you would have made over 100% on your money during 2013. This is an especially good number because risk is considerably less than simply buying and holding. An investor would’ve made just 10 buys/ 9 sales (TNA buy is active since 12/11), being exposed to the market for no more than 100 days.

Here are the results.

$10k to $21k in one year, with less than 100 days invested.