The Pain and Agony Continues

This is just brutal for shorts. It’s bad enough to be short a market that just won’t go down–no matter how bankrupt Europe may be– now the shorts get to endure wild upside moves in just about every stock whose % of shares sold short exceeds 10%. Today’s torture chamber is TSL, FSLR and YGE. Apparently solar is making a come back. Maybe the Obama administration is going to have the Fed print more dollars and just send it over to solar firms. Green energy is all the rage again. We all should have windmills on our front lawns, so that we could systematically kill all birds that might encroach on human territory.

Hey, don’t get all cynical on me now. Us humans have a real problem with energy, post Fukushima. Nuclear is clearly off the table, unless of course you’d be willing to live in a toxic wasteland, tending to three headed goats, for the rest of your pathetic lives. Go get yourself a fucking solar panel and harness the God damned power of the sun. Slap a fucking windmill in your backyard and decapitate your wife–by accident–as she “accidentally” lifts her head to trim the old cherry tree.

If you are monitoring the prospects of Le Fly, you know that he is practically floating around the office, not even paying attention to gravity. Shares of DECK are screaming higher and can only trade north from here, all thanks and praise to the Gods for the blessings.

Finally, I’m about to step in–HARD–(no homo) and buy another heavily shorted stock–this time for humor.

Stay tuned.

Today I was tempted to drift off the plantation of prudence into the hookers den of chinese burrito stocks. There are so many that look so good, infecting my brain with visions of outsized gains in short periods of time. In my head, I saw myself doing 125mph on the FDR, while texting my trader to sell 500,000 shares of some devils stock for a two day 35% profit. The reality is, as documented by my accountant, chinese stocks represented 35% of my losses last year. Let me say it again: chinese stocks represented 35% of my losses last year, spearheaded by the animals who run BORN into the ground.

My Grandfather used to say “son, if it sounds too good to be true, it’s a fucking god damned lie.”

RBCN was a legacy holding, as well as LULU, DECK and all of the other shit on my books now–sans FOSL and MTW. I am now within 5% of my all-time highs. When I hit it, I intend to sloooow down and get real methodical about my buys and sells. This means I will be tossing bowling balls at your heads from my limousine, instead of my chopper.

On the subject of decorum and how to behave while on iBC: some of you are not welcomed here anymore. Let me remind you–yet again–2012 is a charitable year for iBC. I intend to give you money, via contests, and the bannings will be held to a minimum. In the past I’d look at names and simply dislike them for their spelling or get pissed off at a particular state, like MN, and ban everyone in sight. Not in 2012.

If you have an issue with Capitan Fly, take it up with him in the comments and get eviscerated in a public fashion. I am up for it and will keep a stiff win-rate of 100%–trust in that.

However, I will not tolerate trouble makers in my house. Many of you are poorly bred and do not know how to behave amongst gentlemen. For the love of Rick Ross’s big fat face, respect your fellow pleb and keep the hate speech down to a minimum. iBC is a beacon of truth in a sea of lies. This is the Constantinople of finance and the barbarians are firing catapults at our gates. I will not tolerate ignorance and will exact the harshest measures against trespassers, such as melting your fucking hard drive to the ground.

I have a dozen hackers–with nothing to do–willing to send your PC back to Staples.

Enough of the unpleasantness: rejoice in this most honorable melt up and remember to take profits.

The market trades up and then it goes down. Just because the market is going straight up in 2012 doesn’t give you the right to shit on everyones parade. When others do well and show it through a smile and a new Porsche Cayenne Turbo, don’t let your lower class reveal through envious actions. There isn’t a need for your to talk down stocks or better yet explain to me why we’re going lower. I’m a big boy, bigger than you think, and know exactly where we’re going and when.

I took 5% of my cash and bought FOSL today with every intention of buying more lower. I added to my MTW position because China is gonna ease and attempt to kill their poor via runaway inflation.

Hypothetically, if the market went down 200 today and stole 1.5% from my assets, I’d accept such treachery with a gaze then a smirk. I am due for a thrashing, and so are you. It’s the manner in which you take said beatings and how prepared you are to endure it that makes the difference.

We have an interesting situation right now, where stocks are dropping–but GS is holding. It’s gonna be real hard to take stocks down with the financials rallying like this. With my money, I remain long, heavy cash, and a small TZA position 9% in the hole.

I started a new position in FOSL and added to MTW.

Who would have known LULU would up their guidance and send the stock forklifting higher by 6 points this morning? The good men over at Goldman, who upgraded LULU the other day, must be besides themselves with pure joy. Unfortunate to my position, I am without shares of LULU this morning (sad face). However, I am blithe nonetheless.

Like I’ve said to you before, stocks are not personal with me. They are simply a means to an end. In my case, that end is the completion of a Space Orbital Cannon (SOC), whereby I will be able to singularly destroy whole city blocks with one button. To you, the stock market might pay for cheese or bread. We all come here to play the game and to win. Some of us win more than others and that is simply a side effect of a greater story to be told. But we will not sour the mood with DNA comparisons on this joyous morning.

Back to LULU. The excitement in the shares today will spill over into other beaten down retailers, such as FOSL and DECK–just to name two. But the revelry, if I might use that word liberally, is not to be contained to just LULU and other haggard retailers. There is a greater theme at play here, being purposefully executed by the world’s finest men, undoubtedly wearing top hats and white gloves. It is the NFLX squeeze on a grande scale. This is a very simple trade for you to understand, even a young man from 0hio can figure out its meaning.

I want you to research heavily shorted stocks that are down more than 20% over the past six months, whose shares are now climbing–threatening to seize the bears by the heart and squeeze it like a Grand Noir de la Calmette.

Once again, I will seemingly bail you out and provide you with a list to choose from. I do not wish to be thanked in advance, just remembered for eternity.

NFLX, OPEN, FSLR, KBH, TSL, WNR, TWI, CIEN, GMCR, VECO, SFLY, CRM, JEF, BGC, FSL, CREE, STP and WHR.

Being half in/half out of the market, I am in a good position to buy one of the aforementioned names, maybe even two. But that all depends on the price action of the market and if it looks strong enough to continue after today. This may very well be the last day of the spectacular 2012 rally. Or, maybe it is something that can be extended through sorcery. Either way, we will figure it out and profit from the demise of those willing to oppose us.

I blew out of RBCN, turning a 15% loser into a 17% winner through patience and averaging in. It was one of my larger positions, aside from DECK and LULU–which was sold on Friday. Now I am just stuck with DECK, MTW, WNR, GSVC and a little GMXR–with a side course of TZA laser beam soup.

My cash position stands at exactly 50% and my year to date gains at 6%.

I sold out of RBCN.

Shorts are getting obliterated. The indices are not telling the whole story, NFLX is. Heavily shorted names are being targeted by long only funds for the explicit purposes of exacting punishment. There is a lull in news flow and longs are pressing shorts into their vises, then squeezing them ever so slowly.

Several of my longs are catapulting diseased corpses into bear HQ’s, namely RBCN and DECK.

Other heavily shorted names running include: BONT, REE, OPEN, SFUN, HUSA, VVUS, OSG, ITMN, DNDN, HOV, NFLX and IOC.

Heavily shorted stocks with potential to begin squeezing higher, in my opinion, are: SKUL, FSLR, OCZ, CIEN, WNR, ACOM and SFLY–just to name a few.

Let me be the first to tell you: I am not particularly bullish here, as I believe we are overdue a pullback. However, there is price momentum and that can get irrational, especially in a market as rigged as this one. For now, my preferred course of action is to keep cash above 30%, have zero shorts aside from my program purchases of TZA, and stay long names that are heavily shorted.

I bought MTW today because the Stern Agee analyst covering it is on fire and says it’s worth $18.5. Plus, it fits into the whole “global reflation” trade, just in case economic nirvana returns to China–the land of the crane.

I initiated a new position in MTW and bought more DECK.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post you will lose your car keys and wallet. And, you may lose money.

Clearly, the market doesn’t want to go lower. I am trying to understand how everything changed, all of a sudden. It feels like it was just yesterday when Europe was getting its jaw broken for it and now everyone is elated with the prospects of asinine levels of Italian debt coming due.

Now I could fall victim to my caprices and short everything in sight, like a rabid Chanos. Or, I can simply wait–like a gentleman– for my price to reallocate my 35% cash reserves. I need you to understand something, rather immediately. There is nothing that is going to stop me from banging my African jungle drums this year. I shall have a recourd [sic] year and I will savagely destroy my enemies.

I am stalking a stock, like a homeless man loitering well to do buildings in the upper east side. I am waiting for an opportunity to step in and buy size.

Aside from that, the stock Gods are blessing shares of RBCN, one of my larger positions. I warned you on Friday, the shorts live inside of RBCN. If anyone is interested in assaulting the bears, own RBCN. The pain is going to be abhorrent for them–pardon my first rate usage of the English language–I realize the majority of you barely know how to speak it.

In closing, “The Fly” is moving up and everyone is moving down, by comparison. I am eating a crumpet, with a little olive oil, salt and pepper and washing it down with some loose leaf Earl Grey from TEAvana, light and with a bit of honey.

Good day to you.