This is the Biggest Bullshit Record Highs Tape I’ve Ever Seen

I’m getting prison raped, man. I sold this god forsaken RARE for a RARE loss of 6.5%. The OSTK that I purchased this morning quickly and sharply fell like an anchor onto a choral reef, shattering my hopes and dreams for an instant 5% paper loss. I have various other ‘irons in the fire’, if you will, all knifing lower.

I also sold NOAH for a 4% win.

What an indelible tape to be raped by. Why don’t I make fun of the bears now, for being so stupid as to shorting this wonderful tape. What are we 50 Nasdaqs from the highs? Sure, that’s great.

Meanwhile, the Dow is tricking people, higher by 175, and the breadth in this raging bull of a market is at a milquetoast 50%. Even better, the only sectors worth its butter today is basic materials. Here I can prove it, faggots.

I know what you’re thinking: ‘Fly, relax and calm the fuck down. It’s not that bad out there. Be patient.’

NO.

This is how tops are formed, blowing off some asshole earnings release at record highs, slowly boiling the plebs whilst they chase blockchain stocks.

The silver lining in all this is strong tech, meaning there isn’t much distribution amongst large hedge funds. We’re likely seeing some rebalancing out of small cap into large. Bear in mind, my quant has been positioned in small cap for 4 consecutive months. For the day, the quant is +30bps.

How do you expect me to survive off those paltry returns? Why, if I only made 30bps for an entire year, I’d only be up 75% or so, hardly a livable return that I can be proud of.

Truth is, I should probably STFU and go do something non-productive, something to distract me from the everyday tumult and tribulations. Maybe I’ll go for a walk in the woods and throw apples at the bears. Or maybe I’ll go for a siesta, or do some gardening.

Whatever I end up doing, I’m inclined to wait for brighter prospects before writing off my positions. I have hope! I can do it! Yeah!

Ughh.