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Yearly Archives: 2016

The New Prime Minister of the UK, Theresa May, is AGAINST BREXIT

I understand she’s now saying England will leave the EU, in order to become Prime Minister. But what was her position before the vote?

Here it is.

A UKIP donor had this to say, regarding a prospective May administration.

Speaking on the BBC’s The Andrew Marr Show, Mr Banks said he believed Mrs May would be “the death of Brexit, by a thousand cuts”, and would “absolutely” betray the referendum result.

He claimed she may delay triggering Article 50 until it is too late, and circumstances have changed, or echo the Norwegian “political elite” – allowing free movement in exchange for access to the single market.

Some believe the fix is in, which is one of the reasons why markets are surging. Time will tell.

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Markets Ejaculate to New Record Highs; Here Are the Leaders

What a wonderful stock’d market. We’re all just thrilled to see stocks hit new highs. I’ve been punching homeless men in the face with bags of cocaine this morning, even though I’m not leveraged long. I’ve been a crazy eyed bull my entire life, so I am entitled to invite myself to this grande extravaganza despite not being a bull anymore.

Some of you are pondering “what the fuck is going up so much” to cause all of this wanton degeneracy. I am here to show you.

These are the new market leaders, the enemies of the Death Star.

YTD gains
XOM +23%
AMZN +12%
JNJ +21%
FB +13%
T +27%
WMT +22%
VZ +24%
PFE +14%
CVX +20%
ORCL +13%
CMCSA +20%

There you have it: brand new, all time, motherfucking highs. I’m sure all of you hog butchers are HEAVILY long At&t and Verizon, no?

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A New Bubble Basket Has Been Launched

Stock picking isn’t dead yet. My Bubble Basket inside Exodus, an index targeted to find overvalued stocks, is down more than 17% for the year–in spite of the indices hitting all time highs. The last update to the index was given in December of 2015, until today.

Previous to this iteration, the index was heavily biased against biotechs–rightly so. Without giving the freeloaders here on the site access to my new picks, I will tell you that I’ve moved away from biotech and have added some silver, gold, REITs and maybe a few oil stocks–just to name a few.

The index isn’t comprised of the top performing stocks. Instead, it is almost solely based on fundamentals–something most of you eschew because it takes time, intelligence, and patience to understand.

Here are the broad strokes.

Median mkt cap: 4.64b
Median short %: 12.5%
Median p/s: 16x
Median PE: 134
Median Fundamental score (measured on a 1-5 scale by Exodus): 2.78

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Yen-Dollar Cross Gives Stocks a Real Reason to Celebrate

If it weren’t for the yen plummeting against the dollar, I’d throw a bottle of pear juice at this rally and say ‘bahumbug.’ Truth is, the fate of the world lies in Tokyo, center of the world as it pertains to Pokemon.

The yen strength has been a beacon of failure for the central banksters, a repudiation that told the narrative of wanton failure. If the Bank of Japan couldn’t weaken its own currency, in spite of having unlimited resources to throw at QE, how could one sleep at night with all of that danger lurking about the bend.

Never fear, Kuroda is here and he’s saved the day.

The yen is plunging, mind you, against the dollar, by almost 2%.

image

With renewed weakness in the yen, advantageous hedge funders can borrow in yen and buy a shitload of SPY futures with the proceeds. Or, they can borrow in yen and buy hamburger stocks. Either way, the yen is the keystone to liquidity for gamblers and financial engineers on a global scale, so it’s a good thing the value of it is decreasing.

We live in a fucked up world. Markets are hitting new all time highs today.

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Iraqi Hero Saves Hundreds in ISIS Suicide Attack

This man is a hero: Najih Shakir
hero

An ISIS psychopath tried to detonate himself in Iraq to destroy the Sayyed Mohammad Shrine. Aside from the shrine, he intended to maim and kill hundreds of innocent people. The man above stopped the attacker and hugged him, giving his own life and reducing the explosion radius in the process.

The attack injured 70 and killed 38. But it would’ve been much worse had it not been for the heroic actions of Najih Shakir.

Rest in peace.

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Goldman Prices Japanese Unicorn, Line, at High End of Range

Japanese messaging app is due to come public in America on July the 14th. It sports 218 million users, mainly from Asians who like to send stickers of anime to one another. Patently absurd.

Line

After the IPO launches, led by the catamites over at Goldman and Morgan Stanley, its market cap will likely top $7, maybe even $9 billion.

Sales are growing at a 40% clip to around a billion, placing its prospective price to sales ratio anywhere from 7-10x. Bear in mind, Line is up against the global hegemony called Facebook with its What’s App messaging app.

Line will trade under the ticker LN.

Retarded.

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Shares of Nintendo Flame Higher Again, Charizard Style, Due to Pokemon Go Success

Shares of Nintendo are higher by another 22% this evening (trading in Japan), due to the overwhelming social success of the Pokemon Go app. The stock had gone higher by 10% on Friday of last week.

Nintendo

I’ve been summoned by my children to seek out Pokemon, walking around and driving. The app is a work of genius. Water pokemon can be found near the water, while other geographical elements dictate where you can find the other monsters. I’ll say it again, I’ve never seen anything like this affect young people. While the game still keeps people on their electronic devices,  it also is forcing them to go outside and actually walk. Amazing.

Nintendo owns 33% of Pokemon and stand to make a mint from this.

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Deutsche Bank: Europe Needs $166 Billion Bank Bailout

Fucking chicken scratch. Deutsche Bank analyst David Landau believes Europe will need to provide a mere $166 billion in freshly minted currency to bailout the banks, especially the greasy Italian ones. But don’t worry and rest assured, this will not be like 2008. Instead, as Landau put it, we are facing ‘a long, slow, downward spiral.’

Sounds bullish.

 

“Europe is extremely sick and must start dealing with its problems extremely quickly, or else there may be an accident,” Deutsche Bank’s David Folkerts-Landau said, according to the newspaper. “I’m no doomsday prophet, I am a realist.”

With Italian banks weighed down by 360 billion euros of soured loans, the government has been sounding out regulators on ways to shore up lenders amid a renewed selloff after Britain voted to leave the European Union. Lorenzo Bini Smaghi, a former member of the European Central Bank’s executive board who now chairs Societe Generale SA, said Wednesday that Italy’s banking crisis could spread to the rest of Europe and rules limiting state aid to lenders should be reconsidered to prevent greater upheaval.

“I do not expect a second financial crisis like in 2008,” Folkerts-Landau said, according to Welt. “The banks are much more stable today and have more equity. What we face this time is a slow, long downward spiral.”

UUnicredit is down 68% over the past year. Even MOAR BOOLISH.

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This Week in Exodus: A Mid Year Update

It was an eventful week inside Exodus, with several developments and a year to date update. Late last week EDZ had flagged oversold and I took a fairly large position, equating to 20% of my assets. I booked a 7%+ gain earlier in the week.

edz

On Friday, the market ripped higher. Amongst other sectors, the Pacific Banks look stretched. This is a chart of the Exodus oscillator that depicts overbought and oversold ranges. Clearly, we’ve closed at the high end.

banks

For the week, oil and gas were the biggest losers.

down

Once again, silver and gold outperformed.

up

On the oversold side are the utilities. They sold off late last week and are now saddled at the low end of the recent range. Although I believe the sector is way overvalued, based on fundamentals, technical traders might want to take a look at the utes this week for a bounce.

utes

Lastly, here is my YTD update. Bear in mind, I am no longer trading on gut instincts, or reacting to the market based on news events or breakouts, or playing earnings. For the entirety of 2016, I’ve decided to rely solely upon the Exodus algorithms for trades, coupled with some core thesis positions based upon what I believe to be the best ways to invest in this economic environment. Year to date, my gains stand at 4.04%

update

For the week ahead, I am expecting the market to continue its march higher, into new all-time highs–but then trade off mid to late in the week after investors wake up to the obvious facts that they’ve been made a fool chasing an overvalued tape into a harrowing news cycle.

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French President Hollande Warns American Election is BREXIT II, Urges Americans to Vote Hillary

If he means the market will dip and then soar back to all time highs, I don’t really see how a BREXIT II scenario might scare people now. But the message is inexorably clear: vote for Hillary and do the right thing. God only knows what D. Trump will do once in office. He might even levy tariffs against French lavender products or maybe fuck with the croissant trade.

“The arguments in the Brexit vote and in the American presidential campaign are about the same,” Hollande told reporters Saturday at a NATO summit in Warsaw. “In a friendly way, may I also give some advice to the American people to make the right choice when the moment comes.” He didn’t mention either of the presumptive candidates by name.

If elected, Hillary R. Clinton would become the first openly mentally ill President of the United States. As an equal opportunist, I say you give her a shot. I’d love to see her have a nervous breakdown and crack during a live press conference.

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