In their pitch to psychophant followers today, aside from showcasing material improvements in the water proofing of the iWatch, the Apple team unveiled (be-fucking-HOLD) Pokemon Go would be available to play on the device by the end of 2016.
On this news, the crowd went fucking nuts. Paper confetti rained down like a chorus of pure glory and joy and everyone celebrated by buying shares of NTDOY–which are higher by a braindead 24% for the session–or $6 billion in market cap.
What does this mean?
Frankly, it means nothing. For every iWatch that you don’t buy, it would’ve possessed the capability to capture digital monsters, whereby you could then parlay said monsters into heated and pitched battles to attain ‘gyms’–which would then be almost immediately conquered by fellow gamers–continuing a virtual loop of inane depravity unseen since the days of Babylon.
Note: Shareholders of Apple don’t give a shit about this infantile news. Shares of AAPL are lower for the session.
If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter
Have we gone full retard yet?
Completely nuts. Nintendo gets little to nothing out of this being available on the apple watch. Idiots. Wait for the subsequent crash when they once again realize Nintendo doesn’t own Pokemon go