Bayer Adds Goldman, HSBC and JP Morgan as Lenders For Massive Unsolicited Bid For Monsanto

The people who took willow bark and made billions from it, calling it aspirin, have an all star team assembled to lend them up to $75 billion in a bid for the bird brains over at Monsanto.

I don’t know what to think of this whole ordeal. Monsanto has been trying to merge with other insidious companies for a few years now, to no avail. Then this Bayer company comes around, with Goldman, JP Morgan, and every one else, bidding $62 billion in an all cash transaction.

Perhaps the illuminati is displeased with the current seed technology out of Monsanto? Maybe they want to consolidate these two companies, while bringing them back to their core Bavarian roots, to produce corn that also gives mosquitoes an infectious form of cancer, that could then be spread to humans, creating heinous abnormalities?

Fun times lie ahead.

German drugs and crop chemicals group Bayer AG, which has made a $62 billion bid for U.S. seeds company Monsanto Co, has added more banks to its acquisition financing package, according to a person familiar with the matter.
HSBC Holdings Plc, Goldman Sachs Group Inc and JPMorgan Chase & Co have joined existing Bayer advisers Bank of America Corp and Credit Suisse Group AG in the loan facility, the person said on Thursday after the German newspaper Handelsblatt first reported on the news.
The loan facility totals 60 billion euros ($67 billion), and can be expanded up to 75 billion euros, the source added.

I’m just kidding. The Bavarian illuminati are a benevolent sort, according to canon law. It’s a conspiracy and isn’t real. And Monsanto is awesome.