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Financial Engineering 101

The 3:30 Ramp Capital fund was created during the recovery of The Great Recession. As it has been recognized by financial institutions around the world, 3:30 Ramp Capital has been known to add a mysterious liquidity to the last 30 minutes of trading in the U.S. stock market. 3:30 Ramp Capital is disguised under the cover of High Frequency Traders and policies enacted by the Federal Reserve and Central Bankers around the world. 3:30 Ramp Capital AKA Ramp Capital, LLC AKA The Onion of Finance will always be bullish on stocks NO MATTER WHAT. #RampStamp
Joined Nov 23, 2015
71 Blog Posts

My heroes and mentors, Alan Greenspan, Ben Bernanke, Janet Yellen, Haruhiko Kuroda, Mario Draghi, et. al. have all had great success in financial engineering the shit out of the major world economies.  I think it’s time that they transfer some of their knowledge to the little people and maybe a few banana republics who may be interested.

What I am proposing is the following: The Fed should provide free online classes to teach the masses.  That’s right, free.  They already have enough bubbles on their hands, let’s not add the student debt bubble to their list.  An easy solution to this is to provide free online classes via www.coursera.com.

To help them out, I’ve decided to put together a course schedule for some of the basic classes that I believe should be offered.  Feel free to add additional classes to the comments section below and I will make sure to relay your suggestions to people who matter in the world.

Financial Engineering Online Degree Course Schedule:

  • History of the Federal Reserve from 1929-Present
  • Meteorology
  • Non-GAAP Finance Theory
  • Enron and Applied Accounting
  • Bubble Theory
  • Quantitative Easing and the Effects on 401(k) Balances
  • Zero and Negative Interest Rate Policy
  • Psychology of Dip Buying
  • Economics of Unemployment
  • Circular Reference Programming
  • Sociology of Expanding Wealth Gaps
  • Crushing Volatility in Times of Need

Prerequisites include: High School Algebra, Public Speaking, Rowing (Crew), and Watching CNBC.

$STUDY

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5 comments

  1. Dr. Fly

    welcome

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  2. probucks

    @RampCapitalLLC – I’m very excited to have you in the iBC PGallery.

    May the force be with you.

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  3. gsofield

    Welcome.
    How about:
    – Operant Conditioning for the Masses
    – Advanced Fed Speak (pre-reqs: How to Bullshit a Bullshitter, Philosophy 101)
    Look forward to future blogs.

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  4. kneelb4me

    Seems like an interesting MBA course list.

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