Futures Are Soft Following Weak Chinese PPI Numbers — But It Means Nothing

Some of you have gone wayward this evening, after gazing into your computer screens and bearing witness to Dow futures down 150. These same people have given up drink for drugs, in the name of avoiding hangovers and calories, and dare stare into the mirror, with their figurine bodies, and call themselves men.

It doesn’t matter what futures are saying tonight, or what the opening tick might be tomorrow morning.

Truth is, I just wanted an excuse to talk shit. Let me tell you what I really think.

I think we’re now first entering the Fagbox — the indelible situation that I forewarned you about — exclaiming 6650 on the NDX was no more or less than a foregone conclusion.

Now that we’re butting up against it and attempting to defy the laws of reason, it’s very likely we might fail at or around these levels, give or take 50 points from here — bechancing a grave concern led to the downside by oil stocks and the fucking barrels they came into this rally with.

My chart.

I created that chart weeks ago and haven’t altered a single line on it. Bear markets are brutal affairs, cruel mistresses and dangerous bedfellows. They’ll give you aids and make sure to ruin your families and cast everyone you love into the poorhouse.

Bottom line: let the rally fail before reversing course. If we’re heading back lower, we’ll retest the lows and there will be ample time to become DRIP Gods again.

About those PPI numbers.

Today's China PPI result showed a much sharper deceleration than expected. Nomura's Lu Ting sees further evidence that the economy is slowing"at a worrying pace."https://t.co/w8TVbZ9Jgu pic.twitter.com/jfe6pi9AgC

— Jeff Black (@Jeffrey_Black) January 10, 2019

It was a fine close. Let it be noted that not only have you exceeded your authority to comment on financial matters, but you also have offended and injured me deeply with your ignorance. This is precisely the type of close one likes to see.

One enjoys the tinder to cast an orange hue just before roasting the flesh of the uninitiated. You’ve never traded in markets like this, because you were born a short while ago, and have zero life experience in bear markets. Let me educate you how this works — FUCKED FACE.

Markets will sashay, even glide, higher for the balance of January. LateFAGS will then Bogart in fast, hoping to catch a quick score, only to be horrifically executed by a fast and sloppy blade.

You’d be wise to refrain from shorting stocks until the charts break lower. That’s all you have to do is wait. Quit trying to anticipate where stocks are going and simply look at them now.

This is the sort of bullshit one should expect from the Fed. Remember this always: it is their job to make stocks go higher. Without a positive wealth effect, pensions get defunded, budgets disjointed, chaos reigns supreme. If you’re shorting stocks and betting on a black swan, just know you’re taking on a low probability trade.

Source: CNBC

“With an increase in the target range at this meeting, the federal funds rate would be at or close to the lower end of the range of estimates of the longer-run neutral interest rate, and participants expressed that recent developments, including the volatility in financial markets and the increased concerns about global growth, made the appropriate extent and timing of future policy firming less clear than earlier,” the meeting summary stated.

The indecision was reflected in rate forecasts among individual members. Officials cut their expected moves this year from four to two, citing a range of concerns about growth and volatility in the financial markets.

“Concerns over escalating trade tensions, global growth prospects, and the sustainability of corporate earnings growth were among the factors that appeared to contribute to a significant drop in U.S. equity prices,” the minutes said.

The statement after the December meeting replaced the phrase “the Committee expects that further gradual increases” would be appropriate, to “judges that some further gradual increases” are coming. Using “judges,” the minutes noted, was a signal to markets of the data-dependency the Fed will employ. Also, “some” was meant to imply a “relatively limited amount” of hikes would be coming.

WTI is +5%. Junk bonds are green, and stocks are ripping to session highs. If I can teach you but one thing it is this: THERE ARE ENDLESS POOLS OF GENIUSES WHO KNEW MORE, BROKE AND DISHEVELED, AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA, WHO BET AGAINST PROSPERITY. It’s a hard gamble, and you have to be hard boiled and belligerent to pull it off. You’re better off going with the sheep.

We’re back to BILI-clubbing again. I’d like to see any of you try to stop me. I’ll rip your arms out of your sockets and beat you to death with them.

Look at this chart. LOOK AT IT.

$17, post haste.

The market is probably gonna day-rape a lot of people today, swinging to and fro in blackguardly mannerisms. It will fribble away the portfolio values of the weak and mentally disabled. Men in sloppy cloth getting cleaned for their coin — because they chose to anticipate markets instead of bowing it its grandeur.

My biggest losses and with the most prevalence, occurred after I felt something would happen, instead of actually seeing it being done. In other words, quit thinking you’re special and ahead of the curve. You’re not. That one time you nailed an huge inflection point was luck. If you’re not repeating those wins over and over again, you’re fucking up.

Quit fucking up. Follow the market. It certainly will not follow you, fucked face.

No analysis needed here. I stepped in and bought some UXIN, piece of shit Chinese burrito, down at the lows, at a time when stocks are melting up. Potential upside is YUGE.

Probability of this happening: small.

I accept the risk.

Made 6.66% on it. Not kidding.

You buffoon — quit taking the market so personally. You aren’t any good at it because you think it should do what you want it to do. Markets don’t give a shit about your opinions or your feelings. Frankly, I’m sick and God damned tired of reading your incoherent rants. You little shits always come out from the woodworks when markets go down. Like little trolls, you creep around here offering predictions of gloom and you do it without verve or panache. Quite honestly, it’s disgusting.

I am all in on the long side because of some simple facts. It’s no different from a mathematical equation, if to then analysis.

If oil and junk bonds trade up, then stocks will too. Got that you fucking faggot?

Words cannot aptly describe the level of frustration that I feel with some of you — especially the fucking retards who try to tell me how to run money.

Look at the futures spiral higher. LOOK AT THEM.

Now remember who told you it was going to happen. REMEMBER!!!

Now can we get back to thinking straight and with some dignity? I’ve put up with enough of your wanton buffoonery the past decade. I do believe I’ve earned your silence.

We broke out of the downward channel and now threaten to menace short sellers with great vengeance and alacrity.

Over in Exodus — we’re overbought. But based on this stress level over the past 36mos, 85% of the time gains were enjoyed.

Bottom line: This is a high probability trade, even if it lasts for a few hours during tomorrow’s tick tock. The shares I bought today, late in the afternoon, are all subject to my whims and how I’m feeling in the morning. Maybe I’ll wake up moody AF and sell them all. Or perhaps I’d get all patriotic, don an American flag around my back, and continue to hold BABA and my other holdings. Like I said earlier, there’s no fucking way “The Fly” can lose — so get it out of your thick and ugly skulls. I’ll be dancing on graves first thing tomorrow morning.

I bought the following in the last ten minutes of trade.

$X, $GOOS, $SNAP, $WLK, $DBX, $SPLK, $WDAY, $PYPL, $FB, $BABA

My cash position has dwindled to a paltry 5%, with a 20% TLT position as a ‘hedge’. Truth is, I am bored and do not want to sit on the sidelines during a period of obvious bullishness.

Will stocks stop going higher tomorrow?

I have no way of knowing that. What I do know is the prevailing near term trend is higher and I have a high conviction that this mood will spill into the opening tick.