Look at Me, I’m a $SHOPFAG Now

While all of you fat fucks stuff your faced full of powdered donuts, “The Fly” is working hard inside of the stock market mine, trying to find stocks for you and your family to profit from. What thanks do I get for my efforts?

Zero.

I bought SHOP — because Canada is good at only a few things. Doing drugs, selling dog fur coats, rip off work out tights, and bullshit websites that serve as parasitical traps for upstart retailers. In this regard, SHOP is a grande dragon.

I’m looking for the fucker to break new highs, AND MORE. Bias is to the upside for stocks, with a watchful eye out for fuckeries.

First off, this morning’s moves — all of the lateral nature.

Sold CRON -5%
Sold DRIP -4%
Sold SOXS -3.3%

The breakout in crude isn’t something that I am willing to stand in front of, especially with an inverse ETF. CRON is a POS and the semis have some momo.

I bought the following SAAS stocks.

GWRE
NEWR
NTNX
SMAR

Chinese Burrito purchases

NIO

Inverse ETF purchase

TZA

On on hand, the QQQ’s may be setting up for a nice and beautiful long white candle. On the other, the small caps are weak and heading down — a divergence established by the overt strength in FANG stocks — thanks to the NFLX price hike.

Presently, I have two hedges, FAZ and TZA, and 20% allocation in TLT. In addition to my longs, I have 30% reserved in cash. Honestly, I do not have conviction in any trade now, mostly because we’re up against some resistance here, which is going to lead to a large directional move. Part of me thinks up and the other part down. We won’t know until we get past these levels, which I suspect will be resolved by the end of January.

The effects of laying off 800,000 government workers, in addition to the private contractors who depend upon US govt money is going to start stinging to the tune of -0.1% per week — DOUBLE the previous estimate of -0.1% every two weeks.

With no end in sight and democrats deeply passionate about preventing a great big beautiful border wall on out souther border, it looks like a self-inflicted wound is more than likely now.

BREAKING: The Trump administration doubles estimate of shutdown cost to economy from original forecast, source says. Here are some key economic data reports that will not be published. https://t.co/mvoFUdeygy pic.twitter.com/l9qM8mJOD3

— CNBC (@CNBC) January 15, 2019

Now I don’t want to cry chicken little here, but the sky is really falling. JPM missed, thanks to a massive trading shortfall, for the first time in 15 quarters, and the retards from WFC ran out of fraudulent ways to beat their estimates. As a result, the futures, which were swimming higher before I went to bed last night, have now turned lower. Gains have been REVOKED and buy the dipFAGS BTFO.

JPMorgan Chase misses by $0.21, misses on revs

Wells Fargo prelim Q4 $1.21 vs $1.18 S&P Capital IQ Consensus Estimate; revs $20.98 bln vs $21.80 bln S&P Capital IQ Consensus Estimate

Normally I ‘d suggest that a miss at JPM isn’t a big deal, but it sort of is, when considering the fact they are the best bank in the US. If they’re doing ‘poorly’ in this environment, how do you suppose C is doing now?

Nasdaq futures are still higher by 25 and WTI is +1.5%, all bullish for stocks. I’ll be taking my cue from the bond market, specifically looking at the 10yr, which is now yielding 2.69%, down 2bps for the day. BAD.

European markets are mostly down to flat and the buyers look exhausted up here. Let’s see how the first hour of trade is before making any grande assumptions.

You cannot stop the carnage. You might be able to delay it for a short while, but human nature demands conflict and high degrees of drama, especially when traveling up the power totem pole. Case in point, Cramer sashayed around San Fransicko last week and was deeply surprised by the support for war against China around those parts.

Cramer says San Fran TechNerds on board with Trump's China trade war pic.twitter.com/O4MQ3gfsGY

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) January 15, 2019

Dare I say, the spike in futures this evening will be entirely revoked and vomited by the opening bell?

Good night.

It was a non-eventful day FESTOONED with zany moves in healthcare stocks. For a moment or two, I was seduced by a few, but then I quickly regained my bearings and made sure to keep my money nice and safe, in cash.

I closed out the session, 45% cash, with lots of triple downside ETFs to bet on a disaster to come. I realize this is not a high probability trade, but I’m bored and if forced to make a bet, I’d bet on lower prices.

We must acknowledge that stocks are in a bear market and this recent uptrend is nothing more than a respite. Very soon, actual centaurs will traverse the streets of Wall, kicking traders in the chest and defecating on the exchange. I will have you know, I do not intend to be around when this happens and will gladly watch it from the luxury of my own home.

Today was a sandwich say, highlighted by the fuckers on CNBC reminding everyone that stocks were ‘OFF THE LOWS.’ We’ll have these fucking indices on their backs, not before long, and the people on CNBC suffering grave injuries on live teevee soon.

Even though I’ve taken on positions in SOXS, FAZ, and DRIP — the trend is higher. I know, what could possibly cause stocks to go up?

STFU.

Stocks trade up for all sorts of reasons. If I was to give you my best advice, I’d say to eat a sandwich and to chill the fuck out. My shorts are anticipatory trade, unconfirmed. While the markets look tired and we might be topping, price action hasn’t confirmed these theories. Ergo, one must remain open to the idea of even more upside, in spite of how annoying it all is — given the news.

The Pelican Room is only up for a handful of people now, namely the biggest sinners. Because I am a messenger for the Gods, you should know that if you’re able to comment inside Exodus right now — you’re likely destined for hell. Sorry, I did not lead the life of degeneracy that you chose for yourself. Enjoy burning in the fires for eternity.

Still bored, seeing oil go down, I sold my HCLP and SND positions and bought some DRIP in its stead.

I was having a hard time grappling with the fact that part of Exodus is down today, namely the very active social club called The Pelican Room. Normally, I use it to vent and berate my members. But today, without it being active due to tech concerns, I find myself rudderless — back up against the current, fucked, forked, radish.

While you might have a respite, or a safe place to reside during periods of duress, I have none. When I get melancholy and begin to brood, I look for ways to lash out, a classic psychological malady that is often treated with electro-shock therapy. While I may one day sign up for one of those courrections, for now I buy SOXS — betting against the semis because it’s fun to root against US companies wholly based in Asia in the midst of a trade war with Asia.

These companies are all woefully exposed to the pangs, and those pangs may one day bang, and knock their blocks off.

Granted, it’s all very possible that this trade may go awry and I may be forced to devour moar crow; but I seriously doubt it. I seriously doubt in your ability to stop me.

This trade is early and designed to anticipate a move that hasn’t happened yet, so it’s not high conviction.

It’s early, but the price action might be a foreshadowing of a great doom to come.

I sold ACB for a 12% gain, and IQ, YY, and EGO for marginal, mid-tier losses.

All in all, a wash — raising cash in order to better position myself for the great fuckeries to come.