Another Glorious Day

“The Fly” is in his fucking tank, just rolling over pedestrians.  As you know, my unearthly short positions in [[HDB]], [[PACW]] and [[CATY]] are ‘tea bagging’ pension funds, across the globe.

Early this morning, the market stepped into an empty elevator shaft and was quickly impaled by a degenerate bank teller. [[SKF]] hit $211. I cannot believe it.

Right now, many of the financials, led by [[LEH]], are trying to bounce. However, I am very skeptical of such occurrences.

By the way, how wrong can one man (Cramer) be? Wasn’t that jackass just touting [[FNM]], exlaiming: “they’re done going down”?  Seriously, I know CNBC enjoys the “charm” of Cramer, with his manic-depressive lifestyle and all. But, when will they come to grips with the reality that Jim has NO FUCKING CLUE what he is talking about?

In other news, one day after I sell out of my bullshit [[SMN]] position, basic resource stocks collapse. ROFL!

That ETF is out to get me, no doubt.

Also, the ag sector is knifing lower, eating pavement—if I may be so bold. At the moment, [[MOS]], [[CNH]], [[AGU]], [[CAT]] and [[POT]] are worth betting against. Additionally, ‘global growth’ plays like [[TEX]], [[VMC]] and [[ETN]] should always be bet against.

Finally, if you’re a lazy cow fucker and like taking short cuts, get long some [[FXP]]. In my opinion, without any reservations, that fucker is going higher. While I’m here, don’t forget to shoot [[VLY]], [[WABC]] and [[PCBC]]—for good measure.

Steve’s 401k plan is “hurting,” as per Steve, during our weekly garbage night chat.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y88VjW-ZPfI 450 300]

In no way did the fucktarded indices represent today’s carnage. Regional banks were eliminated from reasonable discussion today, as the ongoing financial crisis burns through equity—faster than dirty whores through the S. Bronx.

From [[ZION]] to [[FED]] to [[WM]], we’re in trouble here.

Plus, on top of that, we have a fucking inflation problem, with oil ‘ova here’ at outrageous levels. I hope many of you can really learn to appreciate the magnitude of this crisis and accept it for what it is: A historical fuckup, probably never to be repeated again.

Everything is lining up perfectly for the bears. From banks to barrels, there is so much stress on the system, it is likely to break down and crumble.

As you know, those are very bold words for some anonymous internet God. Keep in mind, at all times, you are some numbskull with a ruler and graph paper, while I travel in diamond rimmed time machines and rub elbows with the stock Gods.

Going forward, I believe it is possible to see a bounce. On that bounce, I will probably let go some of my oil holdings, which include: [[FTK]], [[RIG]], [[ARD]], [[PCZ]], [[NOV]], [[HP]] and [[OII]].

Top picks: short [[PACW]], short [[WABC]], short [[VLY]], long RIG

The lower the market goes, the greater the chances are for a ‘bounce back/short squeeze.’ I know things look dire at the moment. However, as sure as I’m sitting here, the market will rally again, much to Mr. Mortgage’s chagrin.

Now, I do not have a death wish to bottom fish for banks, despite my dastardly [[UYG]] position. However, I think it makes sense to put my balls on the oil guillotine, for the blade is very dull.

I am not afraid of you oil bears. You’re all weak and old. The whole lot of you.

Just know, if I hear any of you talking shit about [[RIG]], I may spend resources to track you down, then have your mustache punched off at your favorite eatery– while drinking a fine Chardonnay.

Other energy stocks worth buying are [[HP]], [[NOV]], [[ARD]] and [[OII]].

Aside from longs, sell short any bank located in California. Personally, I am short a variety of banks, yet again, including: [[HBHC]], [[CATY]], [[WABC]], [[HRB]], [[PACW]], [[HDB]], [[PCBC]], [[VLY]] and [[UMPQ]].

Thus far, PCBC and VLY are leading the way, for inclusion into the NEW “Reverse Five Horsemen” of Death and Hard Work.

NOTE: Another buck shaved off [[PZN]]. Losers. Look for [[JNS]] to follow suit.

I bought 10,000 [[FXP]] @ $81.55.

Disclaimer: If you buy FXP because of this post, Poseidon will fuck up your next cruise. And, you may lose money.

I sold out of my [[SMN]], selling @ $31.65.

Fuck this shit.

I got a better idea, fuck face.

How about prosecuting the asshole bankers, who took the deposits of hard working/lazy Americans and gambled it away—like degenerate OTB guys? How about that, huh?

CNBC is now frothing from the mouth, angered by the amount of coin being minted on the short side. They know bad markets equal bad ratings, resulting in horrendous ad rates. So, after all of their bullshit CNBC sponsored failed rumors (Gasparino, Faber, Pisani, Cramer, Maria the Whore), they are now inviting guests to demand the ‘prosecution of the short sellers.’

The hypocrisy.

This is classic/ Orwellian bullshit.

While it’s true, many short sellers are egregious, with their rumors and ‘reverse hype.’ However, it is FAR MORE pervasive on the long side.

My point:

It is not the short seller that caused the bleeding out of 401k plans and pension funds. No. Instead, it’s a combination of the borderline criminal behavior of investment bankers and Wall Street deal makers, pushing the envelope on leveraged bets, and the fucktarded stewardship of most money managers out there—unable to protect their assets under management.

If we are going to have a witch hunt, let’s string up the guy who took the life savings of a retired coal miner, then invested it in a CDO squared!

Top pick: Short [[WABC]]

I sold short 2,000 [[WABC]] @ $42.60 and 15,000 [[VLY]] @ $14.60.

Disclaimer: If you sell short the above names because of this post, a rival gang in your neighborhood will take over all of the ‘good real estate.’ And, you may lose money.

Hey, if you’re into exogenous events and shit, this is your time. I’m making all sorts of “cheddar” today, making you guys look like cavemen carving out the worlds first wheel.

Bets against the banks have been nothing short of Godly. As you know, I opted to “go the distance” with [[PACW]]. And, looky here, the fucker is down more than 7%. That’s what you call “space alien magician trading.” Not that shit you read in the iBD.

Our Government is trying to avert a crisis of biblical proportions. I love to laugh, then spit, on some of you jerkoffs who bellyache over “government intervention.” All of a sudden, as if you knew two gay fiddles and a straight goat about econ 101, espousing: “hey, let the free markets deal with it. What brand of capitalism is this”?

Well, in case your head has been stuck inside of a trombone for the last 9 months, they (U.S. government) have no fucking choice. They made their bed a long, long time ago—albeit a fucked up one. They can’t switch from babysitting and breastfeeding the U.S. economy to gung-ho free markets now.

Are you fucking nuts?

And, furthermore, who ever said we lived in a free market/capitalistic society? Larry Kudllow?

Well, I got news for you buster, Larry Kudlow escaped from the lunatic asylum 20 years ago, and has been ranting ever since. The fucker even thinks the moon is made from cheese. I bet he’d pay to visit the moon, just so he could take off his “life mask” in order to take a bite out of some “moon cheese.”

Okay, enough of that. Sometimes I get carried away.

“The Fly” is probably going to bet on the whole house coming down. However, it will not happen now. Oh, no way.

It will happen on a foggy day in Fall, when your kids are out trick or treating. You will be so busy with your retarded Frankenstein outfit, you might just miss the whole shebang.

With my money, right now, I am overweight, in a very large and erroneous manner, [[RIG]].

Don’t-fuck-with-me!

On the short side, I own a multitude of inverse ETF’s. But, more importantly, I am short [[HDB]], [[PACW]] and [[HRB]].

As you can see with today’s action, three of “The Fly’s” “Retired Five Reverse Horsemen” are going out o’ bidness [sic]: [[FHN]], [[DSL]] and [[FED]].

In addition, there is massive selling in [[MTB]], [[ZION]], [[NCC]], [[RF]], [[SOV]], [[PCBC]], [[WB]], [[FTBK]], [[HBHC]], [[TRMK]], [[CMA]], [[STI]], [[SUSQ]], [[MER]] and of course [[LEH]].

We’re in full throttle fucked mode. Lock and load.

NOTE: I still hold my bullshit [[UYG]] position. I intend on taking a loss on it, sometime Wednesday. And, take a peek at [[HBHC]]. I gave it to your fuckers, on a golden platter, Friday.