IMPERIAL COMMAND OVER THE STOCKED MARKETS; LE FLY DOES IT AGAIN

Never fooled, often right, “The Fly” did it again, turning an otherwise moribund day into one filled with joy and excitement. I closed the day +55bps, reversing a -65bps deficit, and now find myself long a sundry of retail stocks into what is almost sure to be a good trading day tomorrow.

However, due to the nature of western leadership and their wanton ineptitudes, I hedged with a 15% weight in SOXS.

The day inside Stocklabs was filled with the normal level of discord and controversy, starting off with a member sharing a loan for $650 to his brother. The only catch, this loan was in exchange for his brother’s soul, sort of like a deal with the devil, only this deal comes with a clause that it REMOVES you from your home and golfing clubs.

Other members chimed in with the usual FIRE AND BRIMSTONE nonsense, whereby a loan to a brother was on par with the bombing of Hiroshima. Most of the hardliners spit at the idea that anyone without money should be entitled to enjoy their lives, and certainly not do anything to break up the toil they’re expected to partake in, in order to pay back said loan.

After that, we delved into boats and how stupid the owners of these boats are for having them in the first place.

As all of this happened, I, once again, methodically LEANED into the market with the power of 1,000 SKELETOORS and bought stocks based off the catastrophic 10% decline in crude.

Tomorrow is another day and I am certain it will be a profitable one.