iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,603 Blog Posts

Eat Pumpkin Pie or Die

There are a handful of really good moments of enjoyment in this life. One of them is taste, the ritualistic moments when a person can sit down and really enjoy the food in front of him. Some of you lean sideways into retardation, gobbling down greasy foods like beer swilling idiots. Others only eat dietary foods, salads, steamed fish, veggies — fuck yourselves.

Le Fly has experienced all forms of diets, from gluten free, to vegan, to pescatarian, dairy free, to zero carb horseshit. Without question, the very best diet is one without restrictions — eat what you want when you want it. If this entails wolfing down an entire pumpkin pie during the Fall, so be it. As fate should have it, I’ve been partaking in such a task this week.

Being the only gent at House Fly who cares for the wonderful flavors of Autumn in a pie, I find myself diving into it more and more — dumping a trowels worth of whipped cream atop of it. Truth be told, I view pumpkin pie as a dealbreaker of sorts, the singular food item that can forever link me to you or vice versa. Persons who do not enjoy it are forever tarnished in my mind — relegated to the trash heap of society.

Here’s an interesting question.

Do you eat your pumpkin pie with milk or coffee? Personally, I could go either way. Dairy free non-milkFAGS get the rope, so don’t step to me with your almond or cashew shit.

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16 comments

  1. uglyflint

    Coffee yo. F*ck milk.

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  2. heckler

    Always whipped cream or perhaps iced cream. Love the p pie

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    • Dr. Fly

      Iced cream ruins the P pie. Cut it out.

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      • heckler

        If the pie is still hot though.. the vanilla iced can really work magic. Check it out

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        • Dr. Fly

          No one eats hot p pie. NO ONE.

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          • heckler

            Do you buy your pie Fly? I thought you were a chef now

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          • heckler

            PS it’s all about the crust game

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          • numbersgame

            I eat hot pumpkin pie – with vanilla ice cream.

            And for anyone that doubts my knowledge, just look at the results of my long MU call last week. Lucky for me that I dumped the stock and switched to OTM options timed for the earnings, so $45, $41, $30 is all the same.

            You know a stock is unloved when three analysts say the same thing, and it drops again each time they say it. Makes me wonder if there is anything that Micron could say on the earnings call that would make investors happy:

            MU: “Once again we earned more net profit than Amazon. We will also likely earn more than them next year, but not by as much due the lower chip demand.”
            Investors: “So you are saying that your company is going downhill?”
            MU: “…”

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  3. UncleBuccs

    Milk for sure…or later in life – bourbon. My mother would always fashion me a personal pumpkin pie whenever she was baking for the holidays, and then again in the Spring for my birthday. I had no clue the final one she made me was going to be the last. Glad I just enjoyed it in the moment, instead of trying to freeze it (and ultimately ruin it).

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  4. fryguy15

    Love pumpkin pie. I’m also the only one in the household that eats it, so I get to eat the whole thing. Pumpkin cheesecake is boss too.

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    • Dr. Fly

      I view the whole pie thing as a burden, however. I’d love for someone to snatch some of those calories off my plate.

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  5. acehood

    I work out so I can eat whatever the fuck.

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