A Trap is Being Laid

Fat faced Americans opted to shovel burritos into their pie holes instead of MCD “murder-burgers” and now you’re all bearish about the economy? You people, from the world of twitter, make me chuckle. I do not laugh, ever. However, I will chuckle every so often, when the occasion calls for it.

You’ve been taught some valuable lessons in recent weeks, yet have learned nothing. You see a little morning weakness and take that as your cue to jump into the FAZmobile, speeding recklessly down memory lane. You might as well douse your blouses with a fire accelerant and jump into a lit fireplace, wrapped in burlap.

BEHOLD: you’re all going to be fucked up in short order.

This market is about central banks, free money and corruption on a monumental scale. Since when do we, the people of the internet, care about the spending habits of the obese?

Weakness will be met with buying. Go eat a sandwich.

Some of you have queried “now that PCLN is down largess, will the market follow suit?”

The answer to that question, AND MORE, is no.

There will be pit-stops along the way, haters in the crowd throwing mashed potatoes at the long only crowd. But rest assured, this motherfucker is going to 15,000 by year end. At that moment of triumph, “The Fly” will be celebrating, magnificently, dressed in a “Devils cape,” brimmed out with gold and rubies. He will use magical arts to distract those interested in stopping his decadence. Hedonism, for lack of a better word, will reign supreme in the new gilded era of Obamanomics, part 2.

As an aside, I’ve been developing DDOS bomb attacks to strike at the servers of my enemies. We will dispatch your third tier, lower level, outfit into oblivion.

On any pullback, I am a buyer of VHC.

Top picks: CTRP, EXK, TEA and DECK.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBglso4Kza0

The perverts over at Seeking Alpha published another hit piece on VHC, out of desperation and despair. I spoke to an expert and he said to meet “this fucking rubbish with buy orders.” They (the dastardly shorts) need to break VHC here because the pendulum has swung. Without a doubt in my mind, they are part and parcel of an organized crime ring, centered around bringing down the shares. Naturally, nothing is written in stone and VHC might end up being a loser; but there is nothing benevolent about Seeking Alpha’s “research.” Trust in that.

Should the stock hold its gain here, I gather it will get ugly for those who are relying upon this piece for respite. Next thing you know, Herb Greenberg steps to the plate.

Moving on, I bought DECK off the FOSL numbers. Apples and oranges, I know. However, valuation is compressed and any upside in the earnings will lead to a fierce rally.

I am fully invested, with just 15% of my assets in cash. My favorite picks here are VHC, EL, TEA and CTRP.

I bought DECK

I don’t know why this is happening; but I am going with the flow. There is a very fast train speeding through Wall Street and I intend to ride it to wherever it goes. You can stand in front of it and test your mettle if you like. I will be eating finger foods and chatting with the old geezers next to me about “how fucked up society is today.”

There are so many buys right now and I am missing out on a bunch of names on my watchlist, like RAX. God damn it, it’s impossible to own them all. I will tell you right now, right here, VHC is a buy. CTRP is a buy. EL is a buy, as well as EXK and JACK.

Lastly, it’s TEA time bitches, yet again.

The market will continue to go higher until we reach our upper limits or until TLT is done going lower, which will be conveniently dispatched to the gentlemen inside of The PPT when it occurs.

Until then, enjoy the ride.

Coming soon to the friendly confines of iBankCoin, ChessnWine will be offering a premium service, at a lite price, recapping the previous week of trade and looking ahead. It will be published and/or emailed once per week and will be very comprehensive, useful to all men and women who take pride in knowing things about the stock market.

Chess highlights what the new service will encompass.

 

1. The price action of the prior week of trading, with a brief recap.
2. The leaders and laggards of the market.
3. The psychology of the market involved at the moment, including analysis of sentiment.
4. Emphasis on managing risk and all of the potential pitfalls relevant to the current market, such as navigating through earnings season.
5. Objective technical analysis largely using price, volume, moving averages, and candlestick theory.
6. My current market posture and how to best express that opinion through portfolio allocations and trading discipline.
7. Potential scenarios that, if they materialize, would change my current market posture.
8. Key price levels to observe on the major indices.
9. My best long and short trading ideas for the week ahead.
10. A relevant and significant quote or saying from a legendary trader, such as Paul Tudor Jones.

Bottom line: more than a thousand of you are PPT and 12631 members: I appreciate your confidence and business–as always. This new service will come at no additional expense to the gentlemen who are already members of the 12631 league. Consider it a sneak peek into the ongoings of 12631, for the uninitiated, averse to making longer term commitments, scared to subscribe to premium services. You will have the ability to join on a weekly basis, cancel when you like, while eating iced cream–if you so choose.

Knowing Chess for several years now, I find myself thoroughly impressed with his market acumen and work ethic. He is a consummate professional, who goes the extra mile for all of his members, without committing felonious acts of rage–while high on fucking bath salts, and such.

Providing the stars align in their proper places, this service will be available for purchase on Friday.

It was a nice day in my neighborhood today, thanks to robust and powerful market gains. Common thinking dictates we head lower from here. The rally has been too much, too quick. However, that is the very reason why I love stocks here. It might end up biting me in the face (no bathsalts); but I am willing to take risks while up 21.5% for the year.

Today was all about pressing the tire to the helmet, crushing shorts trapped inside liquidity traps. Should this rally continue, the lot of you will feel as if Knight Capital ran the most egregious errant buy program ever. Because of that specter, I like my chances long VHC, TEA, CTRP and EXK.

The losses you are going to endure, small plebs from Seeking Alpha, will be of the medicinal nature, teaching you the balance of the earth and human intuition. You will take these lessons from my own hand and carve it into your memory, to avoid reoccurrence in the future. You will hate me in the short term. However, longer term, you will owe me your life and livelihood.

For that, I am more than accommodative to dispatch you here, burdening you under the pressures of elephantine losses.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVbCmkNxNbE

I just took down a man sized position in CTRP, based off the cocaine gorilla runs in SOHU, BIDU, and other nefarious names. On the hair of Hector, I shall take what’s rightfully mine in these names and erase the bitter taste of repetitive defeat left by VXX.

Have you ever tasted Vicks?

“The Fly” is gliding in his office today, punching people in the face like plastic man. Many of you felons are on Twitter, emailing each other back and forth, gossiping about Le Fly. Talking shit. I know who you are because I have you under 23 hour surveillance. Don’t ever think, not even for a second, that I will end up with the short end of the stick.

I want you to watch my position very carefully and bear witness to the winship, displayed for all of you miscreant vagabonds, without borders or reservation. It will be a hot summer, especially when I douse you with gasoline and flick my cigar ashes in your general direction.

I added to my burgeoning VHC position.

NOTE TO SHORTS: I am going to eat your liver, with animalistic violence.

IT’S TEA TIME BITCHES.

Tea will trade higher over the coming days and weeks ahead, based upon the caprices of the celestials drinking their beverages.

VHC is NOT the new VHS.

Virnetx is the largest holding in “The Devil’s” portfolio. Betting against him usually results in something evil happening to your net worth. All of you clown-fuckers who are short, will feel the heat soon.

EL is NOT just for chicks and homosexuals.

Real men, such as myself, own EL in size and hope to make great fortunes off the transvestite population spending habits. Also, it’s worth noting, all of the males on CNBC use their products to cover up blemishes and to colour their faces for the cameras.

EXK is a case study in mathematical precision.

This has been plucked out of the pits of tar by The PPT, chosen for its undeniable and sublime compliance with the laws of mathematics. In short, it’s going higher.

Move over Chipotle, a JACK-ass is in town.

Americans love to take Mexican land and eat their food. As a result, shares of CMG have soared in recent years. Well, the good folks over at JACK are opening Mexican eateries called QDOBA (sp?) faster than you can say carajo. Americans will eat at such fine establishments in grotesque numbers. It’s going higher.

Lastly, I am saddened to report YELP is at my average sale price now and looks to be taking off. Out of all of the social networking stocks, YELP is the best. You shouldn’t bet against “The Fly” because he knows his shit. I am not delighted with the prospect of seeing YELP gap higher like this, without my monies deposited into the shares. Hopefully the bastards from Seeking Alpha will pen another “hit piece”, declaring YELP to be nothing more than a mafia driven extortion ring, allowing me to get back in.

Where are the assholes when you need them?