The Crisis is Over and You’re Stupid

Futures are higher because it’s bright. Markets are going higher because they’ve been mandated to do so. Obamacare is good for you because someday down the road you’re gonna get cancer and die from it.

This whole firestorm of shit over Obamacare makes me sick to my stomach. Since when do we give a shit about “democracy” and freedom? Last I checked, fucked-faces, we’ve been depleting our treasury to the tune of, oh I don’t know, 10 FUCKING TRILLION DOLLARS OVER THE PAST 10 YEARS, fighting a fictitious war on terror. Hell, we’ve killed more than a million and maimed countless others, all the while stripping fat-faced Americans of basic right and freedoms, under the directive of Homeland Security: and you’re pissed off because some schlub from 0hio is going to receive free medicine? Boo-hoo, how “un-capitalistic” of us. Hang on a second, let me go ask The Bearded Clam to print us up another trilly to cover the expenses.

Paint me cynical for a second, but frankly, I don’t give a shit. I pay $1,300 per month for insurance and those fuckhead doctors have had it good, real good, for too long. It’s time for those fuckers to face the Black Flag and fall under union command, where other fucked-faces will order them to stick thumbs up people’s asses for $10 a pop.

Colour me cynical, yet again, but I don’t see how this changes my lifestyle. “The Fly” is all about that, and from my vantage point, medicine is for the dogs and homeless old fuckers who need new hearts. Do you think I care if medicine goes up by 20% or even 200%? I DON’T GIVE A SHIT.

On the other hand, I will be voting for Glove-Mitt Romney because I think he’s cool, in a private equity sort of way. He will send the rest of America’s jobs yonder; but corporate profits will be robust and the markets will suck his dick for it (no homo).

I didn’t blog today because you didn’t deserve to read my scriptures. I was out, enjoying a life of grandeur, getting haircuts, eating delicacies–things of that nature. The Zerohedge crowd has been uprooted and violently tossed into the streets for the savage dogs to shit on and devour whole.

“The Fly” is as cool as a cucumber, sipping on a 2005 Bordeaux, drafting documents of war. There is nothing in my way from new all time highs. As you know, YELP gave back a bit towards the end of the day, not out of weakness, but to handicap this game, making it fair for the rest of you to catch up.

LISTEN TO ME NOW, AS IF YOU’VE JUST DISCOVERED SOMETHING HEINOUSLY STARTLING: I am a space alien, motherfucking, magician (SAMM), skating through time in a machine, banking stupid coin in the stock markets, and I endeavor to punch your eyebrows off for getting in my way.

Off to throw jumping jacks at some pikers, from the back of my 1980’s style stretch limousine.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAQ_nZI6JK4&feature=g-vrec

I’ve been SHOMPing all afternoon, while you bear-fuckers have been getting tortured. It’s a beautiful day out there. The weather is perfect and the skies are blue. With great leisure, “The Fly” has been moving around his office in the lightest of garments: white robe and sandals. The incense is burning profusely at le office del Fly, so much that it’s impossible to see the computer screen (which is the cause of my delay).

What would you gentlemen like to discuss? Perhaps we can talk about stocks and if they might trade higher? Or, maybe we can talk about The PPT‘s whimsical algorithms and how it was flagging OVERSOLD in SPY, TNA and some silver stocks, just a few days ago.

While it’s true, I am not partaking in this rally to the greatest extent, due to my 35% cash position. After all, I am merely up 2% this afternoon, pushing my year to date gains to almost 19%, just 1% off my annual highs. As you can see, I have very little reason to celebrate today.

I leave you now, as it’s time to dance to the great African Jungle music again. Talk to you bozos later.

See you tomorrow morning, bright and early, wearing my finest garments.

I want to clarify and crystallize some things for some of the newer readers of iBankCoin. I do not concern myself, whatsoever, with technical analysis. I do not believe in it, never have, never will. I manage a great deal of money, on behalf of very wealthy individuals. I do not consider my personal money to be “risk assets” and only play with a small portion of my net worth, which, incidentally, is likely 10x the size of your bullshit zeeco accounts.

Before I buy a stock, I make a decision as to the longevity of the trade and the amount of risk I am willing to accept. In same cases, I am only interested in 5-10%, upside or downside, in others I go for much more. I use algorithms to find “high probability” trades. But you must understand, it isn’t the holy grail. NOTHING is fool proof. Hence, the very term “high probability” suggests an outside chance that the trade could go wrong.

For example: I bought EXK a few days ago, thinking the stock had bottomed and was readying to bounce. However, when I saw the stock fail to move up, I knew there was something wrong with silver. Instead of cutting my losses, I made a conscious decision to buy more if my position got to -10%. The reason why I did that was because I had 40% cash and could afford to accept some risk. Plus anyway, I really like EXK down here. I’ve traded the stock over a dozen times and have never lost money in it.

Although I boast about the abilities of The PPT: NOTHING is full proof. It is a tool, a great tool, that allows me to not waste time. I didn’t build it for retail usage. I built it for my personal use only, then we opened it up to the public later on.

Some of you manage money and understand what I am talking about. However, the fucking lot of you are simply ignorant to my methods and would be better off sticking your dicks in a lions mouth than fucking with me.

I am generous and I am here to share ideas. But do not think for a second that you know more than me. Plainly, it’s laughable that you would presume to know anything at all. Hell, I bet half of you got to work this morning by being pushed inside of a shopping cart, or by way of skateboard.

Look, I don’t mean to be curt. I am really a very “nice guy”; and for the most part, my “battles”, whether real or “imaginative”, are yours. Having said that, I will track you down and punch your lips loose for getting in my way, even if it’s some small gratuitous comment– left in some half-drunken stupor. Data is being collected and the good folks at iBC are growing very rapidly, under the auspices of the Grande Recursive Order of the Knights of the Lambda Calculus.

You’ve been warned, YET AGAIN.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnOmOsQkyKE&feature=related

You can’t stop this market. You can only hope to contain it.

I averaged down in my EXK and lost less than 0.5% for the day.

Indeud.

I averaged down in my EXK position by 50%.

I am losing some money today, but nothing to lament over. Losses are part of this business. If you can’t take 2% down days, then you’re in the wrong business.

I’ve got my eyes fixed on EXK, as it plunges to lower levels. Apparently, silver and gold isn’t so cool after all and Peter Schiff is bardus.

My new position in MOS is holding up. I like it for July seasonality. The stats are compelling and the fundies in ag are getting better. YELP, NXPI, CPST and ALK make up the majority of my long positions. I have others, all listed inside of The PPT. But, make no mistake, my fate depends on the supply/demand metrics of the above stocks.

What are you doing? Are you buying this dip?

I only bought a little yesterday because it makes no sense to trade ahead of a euro-summit. They are impotent men (no viagra), unable to convince Queen Merkel to cease destroying the continent of europe. Let’s not hold punches here, Germany is committing war, of the financial sort, on its neighbors.

Starting right now, I’ve decided to cease all bannings on iBC. We’ve banned over 1,000 readers since inception, for the sole purpose of discarding undesirables. However, I feel like a fight. Try your worst and I’ll be sure to humiliate you in short order.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Sn6u5YPfZA

How long do you think I’ll be waiting?

I am not going to waste time, dreaming about fictional scenarios. The Europeans need to “save” themselves, but they’re too scared or stupid to do it. The market is supposed to be a lot lower, but it’s resilient. Although today’s sell off is “sad” :(–I really don’t give a fuck because 35% of my assets are in cash.

I will buy when TLT stops going higher. I will buy, in earnest, when money flees safe havens in exchange for riskier assets. I will not buy ahead of suchness. Instead, I will wait until it happens, then choose my spots carefully.

My current roster of positions is just fine and doesn’t require tweaking. I’ve decided to stick with a few names and average in, if needed. Therefore, there isn’t much to talk about, is there? You may scurry along, playing with fire-bombs and FAZmobiles, things of that nature. I don’t short sell markets that refuse to go lower or that bore me.

You have been disciplined and dispatched.

Shame on you for misjudging the tape. From hereon-forth, all parties who were profligate with their stock market suggestions, over the past month, will be banished from the great halls of iBC.

I stand before you, towering with a magnanimous shadow, drinking wine from a human skull– but in no way content. Like a vampire on the prowl, I endeavor to sap the coin from your brokerage accounts and transfer it into my own. YOU WERE WRONG ON YELP, just like you’ve been wrong about your entire life.

I do not win due to luck, but design.

What you are witnessing now is normalcy for me. I can’t help but to win, in largess manner, with all of the pomp and grandeur that someone in my position might expect. I beg of you: bet against me. See what happens.

We are going higher, much to your chagrin (feel free to digress!), and I am now up 17.5% for the year.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4A29uG0KBc