Sorry, You Had to be Flushed Out

Notice how all of you smores eating flower fuckers were looking to fish for bottom yesterday, only to catch a sharp ax to the neck today? Way too many rookies are long equities here, hoping and praying for the Fed or the Treasury to buy them a new polo sweater.

You fucking pikers need to stop thinking so small. And, you little bullshit penny stock whores need to get off iBankCoin. Just make believe iBC is a crime riddled ghetto and you are some cornball with expensive gold chains on your neck. If that made any sense to you, then you know where I stand.

Going forward, expect to see insurers get racked, particularly The Allstate Corporation [[ALL]] , MetLife, Inc. [[MET]] , Hartford Financial Services [[HIG]] and Prudential Financial, Inc. [[PRU]] .

Finally, my cash position is immense. Frankly, it’s more than 75% of my assets under management. First thing tomorrow morning, I will blow out of the rest of my [[SRS]] , [[SKF]] and [[EEV]] , then prepare to go long.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPHzu3oc-2E 450 300]

“The Fly” is covering 90% of his shorts right here, right now, including all of his inverse etf’s.

With the proceeds, he wll brag about his 60% ytd gains and spit on homeless men on the way to his local eatery.

UPDATE: My selling is complete. At the present, I own small pieces, which are quite large for you pikers, of [[FXP]] , [[SKF]] and [[EEV]] . I will sell the rest tomorrow.

Again, I am not buying anything.

UPDATE II: I’m out of here. Off to eat some dead lobsters and shit.

Some of you go on short term streaks of gaudy, yet ridiculous, coin banking endeavors. Some so called “legendary” money managers blog on the interwebs claiming to know all, yet offer nothing but capital losses when shit hits the meat grinder. Other talking faces go on the gogglebox and yap up a good spiel, but come up snake eyes when managing their assets in real life.

On the other hand, “The Fly” is in a constant state of victory. It humors him when some of you pigeon feeders say “oh shit, Fly is a dick. That’s a contrary indicator, bitch.”

It does not anger me to read such tomfoolery, since had you traded against me for the two plus years I’ve been schooling you fuckers, you’d be down like 100% on your money.

Hence the term: “it’s not who laughs first, but who gets to bankrupt the other,” applies so candidly.

By the way, commercial RE is in full fledged disaster mode here, enabling “Plutonium Petey” to bank even more coin in his greatly reduced [[SRS]] position. A special shout out to “Reggie” for nailing that General Growth Properties, Inc [[GGP]] short sale call.

In closing, I am in celebration mode here. I have frozen my activities to short covering and inverse etf sales only. Unlike previous cataclysmic drops, “The Fly” intend to nail this one, then go to cash, while the world burns around him.

NOTE: Doug Kass is just an idiot.

UPDATE: I bought 3,000 [[FXP]] @ $121.

All of you are staunch communists and you don’t even know it. You’re over there, in your bullshit office, sitting in your bullshit chair, wishing and praying for the Fed to buy commercial paper. What the fuck is wrong with you (“The Fly” is talking to you, directly)?

So now the Fed is going to take tax payers money and buy Caterpillar Inc. [[CAT]] bonds? Great.

After this uber recession is over and done with, our government will own the entire banking industry and everything else, via commercial notes. Don’t you see the writing on the wall?

Answer: of course you don’t, because you’re an idiot.

By the way, the strong dollar is God smacking the U.S. economy, amongst others. Ever since we’ve been “enjoying” a strong dollar, commodities have been getting gorilla raped, and our exporters have been merely ape raped. Also, keep in mind, much of the ‘global growth story’, that you morons were espousing, relies on commodity driven economies, such as Russia, Brazil and many pac rim players. In short, the strong dollar may not have caused the slowdown, but it definitely accelerated it.

Or, one can make the argument that we never really recovered from the 2000 collapse. The temporary rip in the markets (2004-2007) was a direct result of a commodity bubble, caused by an insanely weak dollar.

You decide. I could careless.

A great man once said: “My feelings, as usual, we will slaughter them all.” Everyday, I wake up to these words of wisdom. Senor Tropicana will continue to slaughter them all, each and everyday, until his fucking brain explodes and/or his arms and legs get ripped off from his torso.

Unfortunately, I have a business meeting to attend this morning and will not be able to clown around with you pikers, until noon-ish. In the meantime, just know, I have every intent on selling short this jerk off market until the goats come home.

More on this later.

You’re all a bunch of grotesque looking, fish odor smelling, fat neck having, bottom calling mother flowers.

I hope 99.9% of you long term bottom dwellers morph from pigeon feeding imbeciles into “instant millionaires” tomorrow, during the scheduled “major short covering rally.”

Being that we have like 00.001% on the downside left, with 1,000,000% on the upside to go, “The Fly” sold his boat, car and watch, in order to lever up and get long stuff. All sorts of fucking stuff, because the internet said so.

Who needs years of grueling money management training when there is the magical internet?

UPDATE: Iceland, major carry trade player, is on the verge of national bankruptcy.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKcHftQoQp4 450 300]

You idiots never learn. You’re like small children waiting for Mommy (The Fed) to give you a bottle.

Asshole dip buyers could not resist buying the carnage, effectively delaying the inevitable mark down of stocks. People stepped in, with hairy knuckles and deformed faces, and sopped up shares of destroyed ag and bank names, because they are hopeful of a 100 basis point Fed rate cut.

Take a step back and realize how idiotic that is.

The market is going lower because the global economy is in the process of slowing, with great vigor. All companies that rely on emerging markets or credit, will continue to suffer despite lower rates.

So, in short, I was going to buy today, only if it was ugly. However, since all of the idiots were out and about lap dogging the bulls, I decided to hold cash and wait for better bids.

NOTE: I sold half of my [[SRS]] , 25% of [[FXP]] and 25% of [[SKF]] , with no buys.

I am running screens of stocks with high cash levels, no debt, who have been punched in the family jewels. I cannot believe [[REW]] is over $105. The carnage is somewhat mind numbing and would be depressing, if I didn’t have ridiculously sized short positions.

There are so many stocks worth bottom fishing. But, it makes more sense to short cut the research and get long 200% upside etf’s, like [[UYM]] , [[ROM]] and [[UYG]] .

I have a lot of cash right now. I sold out of half my [[SRS]] position, north of $109, and want to get long.

But, considering the downward momentum, I deem it to be too dangerous to buy here. We are likely to “enjoy” another gap lower tomorrow.

So, in short, I am long [[SRS]] , [[SKF]] , [[REW]] , [[FXP]] , [[EEV]] , [[SSG]] , [[TWM]] ; but will look to buy the death, sometime soon.

SPECIAL EMERGENCY UPDATE FROM THE VATICAN:

The Pope has spoken. The financial system is ‘built on sand.’ The apocalypse nears.

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…you do not start looking for new couches and side tables, for your bullshit house. First, STOP the bleeding. Do it now; it’s never too late.

Next, think rationally and try to resist the temptations to “make it all back” in one trade.

Get your fucking lists ready, both long and short.

We all know the commodity sector has been ravaged. But, that is not reason enough to get long. If you insist on putting your hands in the fire, be sure to limit your time there.

At the moment, “The Fly” is eating popcorn and drinking excessive quantities of Monster Energy soda, while watching Dick Fuld “fortune cookie” himself on “The Hill.”

As for bottom fishing: Don’t do it.

This fucker (market) is likely to halt trading today or close at the lows of the day. If you insist, get long a few lotto tickets 10 minutes before the close.

With my money, in an unprecedented move, I may just cover my shorts, go to cash and throw my trader/servant out the window.