iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,563 Blog Posts

If Your Thermostat is Negative Degrees, God Hates You

Humans cannot survive in -50 weather. Agreed? You can’t plant crops, run outside with your dick out procreating — can’t do shit. Agreed? With that logic, assuming there is some mythical being “in the sky” who somehow created the fucking universe, one must deduce that if he is bombing you with frozen thermostats now — he hates you.

Plain and simple.

Look at the places God is punishing today.

All of those places are shitty areas in the country to live, let alone attempt to raise a family. If, by chance, you live in Chicago — not only do you have to deal with thugs mugging you for your Canada Goose jackets now and a murder rate that would make the devil proud — but now you have inclement weather that belongs in the fucking North Pole for the penguins.

Simply put, the midwest isn’t a very strategic or important area of the country. It is filled with mountebanks — men and women who escaped the east coast because they were poor, on the run from the law, or too dumb or lazy to make it all the way to California.

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20 comments

  1. irma vep

    Um, there are no penguins at the North Pole or in the Arctic.

    That said, I’m more concerned about the seven days of clouds in the current forecast. No sun for seven days! In the winter! This is punishment for the transgression of sloth. It must be.

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  2. helicopter money

    NOT NICE.

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    • irma vep

      I wonder if Admiral Fly meant thermometer instead of thermostat? God, I’m being a real pain in the ass today. It’s a good thing I’m slothy and being punished for it.

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  3. edge

    I live in the Midwest and I hope you Fuckheads in the bloated population centers stay on the coasts. Seems that humans are a major risk factor. Stay away. You fuck up trees, critters and anything natural or Holy. If there is anything holy. I just liked the way it sounded.

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  4. acehood

    Oh yeah the taxes and weather in NJ are so much better.

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  5. the hungry dog

    Good morning Boys & Girls. Look at the map where it is 39 degrees in Texas. Thats me right in the middle of Austin Texas. Got my shorts and Birkenstock sandals on because the high today will be 60. BTW my MJ stocks are still trending higher. No end in sight. Stay warm!

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  6. 1option

    Just outside of Duluth, Minnesota and its pretty chilly. But doesn’t Dr. Fly have some close ties this area (wink wink)? This is an odd blog.

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  7. ferd

    Wind chill “temps” are fake news. But for the actual cold temps, blame the Canadians who sent it.

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  8. heckler

    Agreed why the fuck is everything “feels like” now? There’s no fucking wind inside your trailer is there? Anyway, the mid west might be shit but just imagine how absolutely dick fucked the south would be without the rest of the country! Barely better than Mexico I suspect.

    I followed Fly into CLF a few weeks back and that fucker is ripping tits. Any advice on when I should sell?

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  9. og

    High of 71 in SoCal today. Had to wear a jacket this morning. Brrrrrr.

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    • edge

      Is that the temp inside the brush fires?

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    • ferd

      In the teens, sunny, clean, bright and warm even with the heat off. 10 inches of fresh powder overnight. Clear southerly views of the frosted tops of Blue Ridge, Pico, and Killington.

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  10. kdogg1787

    Some are stuck in the Midwest because its my grandparents and parents you described. Terrible at life. Now I am stuck with a wife that feels the need to stay close to her insane family. Oh, and my blue collar job will never move. Ive won the midwest! Figured it out! But thats like being the lead pilot in a kamikaze mission. Exciting! Please post tropical pictures

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  11. numbersgame

    Wind chill temperatures are real, actual temperatures are fake news.

    What matters to human comfort – and body functions – is not external air temperatures: it is heat loss (or gain). There are three methods: conduction (touching something hot or cold), radiation (think standing in sun vs. shade) and convection (heat loss from moving fluids such as water or air, ie, wind chill).

    The higher the wind velocity, the quicker that you body’s temperature moves towards the air temperature. You body will lose heat faster in cold air with high winds, and that is what’s important.

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  12. numbersgame

    FED:
    Good news on the rates front: “muted infaltion” and reduced number of hikes. Matkets up.

    On the balance sheet front,the market wants them to keep the balance sheet large instead of reducing it, but that doesn’t appear to be happenning

    Prior to June 2017, the policy was to take in payments on Treasuries and MBSs and use that to buy more Treasuries and MBS’s, respectively. That changed.In June 2107 so that they woudl only buy more Treasuries or MBS above a certain Threshold, which gradualyl moved higher to $30B/month for Treasuries and $20B/month for MBS.

    Now if the FED stops buying MBS, that cause mortageg rates to rise (supply and demand), which is bad for housing and just about everything else. Simialr for Treasuries, particualrly on the long end.

    So in December, the market tanked when Powell said that the balance sheet reduction was on autopilot: https://www.cnbc.com/2018/12/19/fed-delivers-.html

    Then it spiked up Jan 4 when he revised that:
    https://www.cnbc.com/2019/01/04/fed-chief-powell-just-walked-back-his-autopilot-remark-and-the-financial-markets-love-it.html

    Here is waht the FED says today: “active management of the supply of reserves is not required.” https://www.federalreserve.gov/newsevents/pressreleases/monetary20190130c.htm

    Sounds like “autopliot” to me..

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