The VIX bounced off the all reliable $12 level and is now higher by 9% today, thanks to some early morning weakness, likely due to the Italian referendums, the Jill Stein recounts and dreadful brick and mortar Black Friday sales, which no one wants to discuss anymore. After all, Amazon is doing great.
Not before long, in our lifetime, you’ll bear witness to entire shopping malls being acquired by Amazon and converted into warehouses for their shit. All of the mall workers will be fired and robots will take their jobs. If you try to rise up against the robots, an automated uber will deliver robot security guards to cut your arms off — but do so in a way that you’ll live to tell the tale. Robots are all about precision.
VIX TITS is spiking, but no one is really scared. There’s a distinct smugness, an air of invincibility permeating the marketplace. The United States literally elected Hitler and the SPY ran higher by 8% because of it. Nothing can stop the market now. Not you, not a dead Fidel, not even Putin.
Everyone laughs at the VIX and throws popcorn at it. It’s all fun and games, fuckers, until your brokerage accounts hits zero and you’re pissing your fucking pants because you dropped your whole load inside of the market at the top.
You thought deleterious trade deals for China meant higher copper. But you were wrong and your face got fucked for it.
You thought building a 2,000 mile wall on the Mexican border was good news for Mexican stocks. But you were wrong about that too, as well as betting that the Fed could do whatever the fuck they wanted, and get away with it. Having $20t in debt was good news, until it wasn’t anymore. Rising rates into prospective fiscal stimulus and actual deflation proved to fuck your face, yet again.
BREXIT proved to be less than harmonious and the destruction of the EU and its currency wasn’t exactly news worthy of buying more shares. That too ended up drilling serious holes into your flotilla, sinking you to the bottom of the swamp, to be ravaged and eaten alive by cold blooded sharks.
Lucky for you, none of this has occurred yet. You can still enjoy the hedonistic gains, uninterrupted, as you donate residual funds to the Jill Stein recount effort.
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This market is like the current season of the walking dead. Lowest viewer rate to date. So boring they can’t even make crap up to keep people watching.
I am not for murder or torture except under extenuating circumstances. One such one just happened, whereby John Shill Hardwood 4 John spirit-cooker Podesta, just said that “Trump send out a ‘FALSE-tweet’ that millions of illegals voted, without evidence”
off with his head, ISIS-style