MCD is Disgusting Filth

So MCD handedly beat eps estimates this morning. Seriously, I don’t know who is buying their shit. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn MCD is storing billions of Big Macs in some nefarious warehouses in Chinatown. And don’t give me the line that it’s cheaper to eat at MCD than to make food at home. Do you know how they make their chicken Mcnuggets? Whole chickens get transformed into paste. It’s a science fiction nightmare and their food is killing people, literally.

So what do I eat, you query?

Well, let’s go through a typical day.

I wake up and drink a little Earl Grey tea, with honey and 2% milk. Yes, of course, the milk is organic and without anti-biotics. My typical breakfast is either egg whites with toast or simply a crumpet with a little olive oil and pepper. I never use butter.

During lunch I like to eat sandwiches, usually turkey (fresh) or some hummus and grilled chicken on a pita, lettuce tomato and gold. That’s right, I fucking eat gold.

For dinner, I eat whole wheat pasta or some variety of chicken, never fried in grease, typically grilled or roasted. I eat red meat about once per month and maintain my protein via beans, fish, chicken and supplements. I do not add sugar to anything and avoid it best I can; but I’m not fanatical about it. Simply put, I prefer the taste of water over any beverage and find myself drinking it all day long, as a result.

There is never a reason to eat like a filthy animal, no matter how poor you are. If you give a fuck about what you put into your body, you can easily eat healthy– inexpensively.

As for stocks, I expect a minor sell off, only to be backstopped by that deranged fucker, Ben Bernanke. As bad as this tape looks pre-market, you just know it’s gonna bounce hard–graping the bears into late day submission.

I ex’d out stocks with market caps less than $1 billion to avoid talking about BVSN. Thus far, the winners of 2012 were the losers of 2011. Like magic, the calendar year has brought great fortune to commodities, banks and fucking chinese burritos. The more I look at this list, the more I hate the market.

Maybe these stocks will fall into the background, allowing true leadership to step forward. Nonetheless, as of now, this is what we have.

Today was not my day. Most of my stocks went lower and I was paralyzed from pulling the trigger on potential new positions. Today’s big standouts were natural gas stocks, thanks to the cessation of blood letting from the sector. Natty bounces one day and all of the midgets cannon-fire themselves into these stocks: unfuckingbelievable.

The biggest hybrid moves in The PPT were GDP, SWN, HNR, RRC, FST, KWK, XCO, UPL etc.

Gold, silver and copper did well too, even coal. As a matter of fact, just about everything did well except my fucking stocks. Perhaps there’s a black cloud hovering over me, death himself at my doorstep. I’ve been known to push the envelope and make fun of the Gods. It wouldn’t surprise me in the least if some sort of reprisal was in store. However, “The Fly” doesn’t need the help of the Gods, nor does he fear grave karmic reversals, for he is immortal and his financial position is failsafe.

For the day, I shed 1.2% and black clouds strewed trash all over my top hat.

Okay, it’s time to start losing money again. I expect to lose a few mill over the next few days. My head is so hard it could break diamonds out of mountains. Nothing will shake me out of my positions, with exception to the winds of time. I am getting the shit kicked out of me in DECK today and yet I have no reservations about holding it through earnings, dearly scheduled in February. As a matter of fact, all of my stocks are lower today, effectively SHAVING 1.25% from my moneyline.

I’ll buy a million shares of WNR if it ever gets down to $12 again. Without press or Cramer triple buy awards, the refinery sector is on fire again, ripping off Joe the Loser at the pump with the harshest intentions possible. These refiners are making so much money off the despair of others, it’s hilarious.

I hope you pikers are working hard, trying to advance your shitty careers. America needs more vinegar, less honey.

As I write this, Mrs. Fly is literally stroking out over the Drake song posted in the previous thread. She’s threatening me with such a fury that I had no choice but to laugh loudly and blast the song with the greatest belligerency she’s ever seen. I went African Mask on her.

Back to work for me.

Back in the old dot com days I used to trade in and out of a bullshit company named Broadvision. The bubble burst and the share price “corrected” (think The Shining), sending BVSN into a permanent state of irrelevancy–until now.

By the magic of criminal stock manipulation, the share price of BVSN has tripled in recent weeks on zero news. Well, there was news, but it had nothing to do with the company. TIM posted a shockingly competent post regarding the foolishness that is BVSN and I cringe at having to link to his blog; but it’s worth a read.

Moving on.

When the market goes up the way it has in recent weeks, everyone wants to get in. Generally speaking, people chase momentum and sell into fear. More often than not, especially in recent years, this has been the inverse of what you should be doing. I am just as guilty as many of you. When the new year began I was 50% cash and now I have 15%. I’ve taken it upon myself to position into heavily shorted stocks with the belief that short sellers will capitulate, cover, and die in agony, whilst I flick my cigar ashes at their carcasses.

The truth of the matter is, the market is in danger of hurting me again. We’ve had a big run and I am positioned too aggressively. I am up around 7.5% for the year and within 4% of my all-time highs.

On the other hand, perhaps the market is due to break out to the upside. After all, the economy seems to be improving and housing might be firming up. Should Europe rescue itself through sheer lunacy, this market might go parabolic, BVSN, to the upside, grape-raping bears until their fucking faces fall off.

All of my accounts are near all-time highs. People are happy, fat, suckling off of whores, bored of decadence. Men I know buy cars for the price of middle income homes, not to brag, but because they can. I like to think of myself as an investor in time, betting on the prospects of others, for better or for worse. I am a frugal man, who only spends money when it’s required; and I never let the caprices of my business create erroneous spending habits. There are times, granted, when my superfluities lead me to spend a good $5,000 on weekend fun; but it’s all in good taste and that amount of money is nothing but a pittance. I have modest desires with regards to orbital space cannons and the establishment of fortress cities in offshoot corners of the world.

I also realize there is a great dichotomy between people like myself and others, struggling to make ends meet. I don’t feel sorrow for anyone because every man has to make his mark. If I was out on hard times, I would expect the same indifference from all of you. There is no need to nurse a broken spirit; it needs to be repaired through the fire of hardship. I won’t delve into platitudes regarding what this country was built upon. It’s too cliche at 1am in the morning on a Friday night. But if you are enduring hard times, just know that others, including myself, have been there and have not only survived, but flourished. There is never a reason to feel dejected or morose, unless of course you have psychic abilities and already know how your story ends.

The best thing that ever happened to me, aside from the birth of my three children and being born, was getting fired, by some fat shlub, early in my career. It took a little bit of time and dedication to exact my revenge; but I accomplished it severely– and he felt the heat from the fire of my soul when it happened. Some people break under pressure and get swept under the rug, others build skyscrapers with the shattered pieces.

Fuck it. I just loaded up on MWW. My foot is now firmly pressed down on the gas, heading for a crevasse, because I have a nitrous oxide engine and I can make it to the other side.

Don’t look now but GSVC is likely to spiral higher and soon. Remember, Facebook is going to file iPO and when they do, people will race to own GSVC, as they own FBOOK is the private markets. Before GRPN and ZNGA ipo’d, GSVC ran 25%+ each time, then collapsed after the emotional roller coaster climaxed. I expect the stock to trade north of $18 the day before the FBOOK ipo. The play is to accumulate from now until then and liquidate one day prior to ipo.

Look, I am made from win. Even when “The Fly” loses, he’s winning. Shit is out of control at Le Casa del Fly. The money keeps rolling in and it’s never gonna end. On a separate note, the boys over at 12631 are hitting homeruns, at a ridiculous clip. Go check them out.

The very essence of how I am positioned now is to profit from the pain felt by unworthy short sellers. I’ve taken it upon myself to be long stocks with bountiful short positions. Bet against me…lose your house.

I added to my MWW position.

I gather you will be drinking from tiny piccolo bottles of wine this weekend, in order to celebrate the week that past. So you know, “The Fly” will be guzzling from melchior sized (30 litres) jugs of ambrosia, with a chest full of pride for the gains that have been taken. As told to you before, 2012 will be the year of “The Fly”, with nothing but joyous occasions and perverse stock market gains in store.

We all know the market has to pull back. It’s not a question of if but when. Please refrain from throwing yourselves into lit fireplaces when this occurs. It is 100% natural and welcomed by true market participants. In this market there are three types of players: the degenerate day traders, speculators, and finally, big dicked investors. The short term moves are dictated by degenerates and soft nosed speculators. But over the long term, both degenerates and speculators alike fall under the auspices of fundamentally minded investors. Meaning: eventually, the chart chompers get tossed into open manholes and the people who know how to read a balance sheets sit on thrones, drinking from chalices made from diamonds and rubies.

If you find yourself getting whipsawed by the market, perhaps it’s time for a change in philosophy, no? Maybe it’s time for you to consider dollar cost averaging into a core group of stocks, in order to moderate your frenetic mannerisms. Trading in and out is not for everyone and if this is not your primary occupation; dare I say, without the explicit help from seasoned veterans, you are climbing a hill that is slippery, treacherous, and nearly impossible to conquer for the average pleb.

Natural gas is going to zero and people don’t wear shoes when the weather is warm. BP went out of business after the gulf oil spill and CCL will never float a boat again. NFLX was going out of business and now they are rising from the dead. When looking at things through the narrow scope of a short term trader, fatalism reigns supreme. Stick to what you know and avoid jumping to conclusions.

As for me, I will look for new opportunities, but keep my cash levels above 20%. I find it hard to hedge in a market that has upward momentum–which is why I sold TZA yesterday. I’ve been through the craziest markets, managing money professionally since 1997. It never gets easy, but it does get familiar.

Top picks: DECK, FSLR, MWW, SODA
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jY6b1DdSCwk&feature=related 603 500]

Truly, this is hilarious stuff. Not only are we disallowed from drilling for our own oil rich properties, but now, Obama is against transporting oil from Alberta, Canada to Cushing, Oklahoma, all the way down to Houston–where it is needed most. This singular decision, when you break it down, is without a doubt at odds with traditional interpretations of reason and against the will of the American people. Obama is the Manchurian candidate.

So instead of transporting oil from Canada via pipeline, Obama will have it shipped in from Venezuela or Saudi Arabia. You do realize that much of the oil to be transported via Keystone would have originated from the Dakotas, don’t you? Are you aware of the fact that N and S Dakota might have more oil than Saudi Arabia, just waiting to be tapped into? Yet, instead of exploiting this resource, as a nation, we’ve fucked ourselves in the back of a jam sandwich.

Remember when the Seaway Pipeline reversal news fucked refinery stocks–sending me bouncing around crazy at my local mental health facility? The pipeline was sold and Enbridge announced they would magically divert all of that oil from Cushing to Texas, which in turn raped crack spreads and led to a collapse of the WTI-Brent crude spread. Well, ever so quietly, that reversal magic has been delayed until June. Couple that unfortunate news with the Keystone rejection and we have ourselves a Mexican standoff–where America loses and does so without style or pizzaz. Without that extra oil from Canada, the glut of crude will remain at Cushing and crack spreads are poised to recover. Plus, this pipeline fiasco all but ensures that no pipeline will ever be constructed again in this stupid country–reminiscent of our new refinery construction aversion.

Have a look at 321 crack spreads since the Seaway Pipeline news crushed spreads.

Impressive no?

Even better, WNR is 33% hedged at around $27 for the entirety of 2012 and 25% hedged for 2013. The company will report an obscene profit on their hedges– and should spreads recover in full– the stock is going to rip tits, mustaches and blow out brains– making people rich in the process. The companies in the best position to profit from widening spreads are MPC, HFC, CVI, DK, WNR and ALJ.

This has been a very hard trade–due to roller coaster-esque volatility; but I haven’t lost money trading WNR yet. The stock has recovered a great deal from recent lows and is a buy on dips, in my opinion. Although the Keystone denial is a tough loss for the average American; I am not part of that class and take an obtuse position against my neighbor, as any proper oil man would, with the explicit intention–motivated by unparalleled greed– of benefitting from this most ruinous event.

Milk or be milked. $4.00 gasoline by June.