16 We rallied and there wasn’t a sell-off into the close. My bicep/forearm isn’t torn, this means heavy fucking deadlifts today BIATCH! I really have nothing bad to say, fuck Europe, who gives a shit about those idiots anyway? I am seriously lookin forward to some Marin Brew Co tomorrow, if you don’t know, you fucking should! What else is going on out there? I talked to fucking FINRA today, they are annoying as fuck. Basically, they told me I need to contact someone who has a “RIA in a box” and that I need to take the series 65 before anything else, well fuck you very much. The good Dr doesn’t have to do shit ’cause he is a CFA. I am studying to take the first CFA this winter yet FINRA, couldn’t give a fuck less, they have a series # for everything, including wiping your ass apparently. FUCK THEM.
I am looking at some YELP calls here, but extremely fucking cautiously. I still have a very bad taste in my mouth over the months of April and May. I am becoming a fat old dude, not working out enough because I am always fucking injuring my body that is, more or less, falling apart. I know, I know, “take it easy” this is not in my vocabulary, my dad is in his 60’s still running 3 times a week up to 10mi. He is a rather small and nerdy nuclear engineer so he can still do that, me running, I lose feeling in my left leg after 1/2 a mile because of the disks in my back I compressed back in ’05 on a night jump. It looks as though MCPJ and I will be doing deadlifts today and some rowing sprints on the rower machine. I think I have a fuckin gluten allergy, which seriously fucking sucks as I love beer. I will be looking to get some gluten free beer today at Bev Mo, I don’t particularly enjoy grain products so the others shouldn’t be a problem. I was previously diagnosed as lactose intolerant, but I seem to have grown enough of the good bacteria back. Another weird diet thing, I used to eat 8 egg whites and 2 yolks everyday, until my body stopped processing them and they went right through me. It seems as though this has fixed itself as well. I have been also taking “Good Belly,” for the last few days which has given me a marked improvement. Besides what I mentioned above, I contracted multiple stomach viruses in Iraq and they have followed me home. Good Belly punches them in the face with pro-biotics and vitamins. I am also seriously considering the “Paleo Diet.”
None of this is for vanity, mind you. I have never been one for form, only function. I have horrendous stretch marks from lifting way too hard, or from my weight belt pinching/pulling, shins scraped from riding BMX and doing deadlifts, multiple scars from fighting, etc. You would never know if you saw me with my clothes on, but I know you are currently undressing me with your mind.
Besides working out, eating, and drinking beer, I will be watching the Giants continue to dominate, there is UFC on tonight, and I will hopefully finish this god forsaken ADV. Someday soon I am gonna get back on the BJJ mat. What do you have going on this weekend gents?
EDIT: If I don’t pull at least 495lbs today, I will be buying MCPJ a twelver of “The Banquet Beer.”
EDIT 2: I have been lifting and doing athletic shit for most of my life, so if you tell me to take my skirt off or give me any advice that isn’t warranted or your name isn’t Mark Bell, Jesse Burdick, Greg Jackson, or Romulo Melo, then shut the fuck up.
Matt Freeman will punch your mooustache off.
16 Responses to “Weekend Time: Workouts Diet Etc”
Heisenberg
it’s all about diet dude. do the Paleo but 4-hour body explains it better; the gym only makes you hungry; cut the sugar out and take on more meat!
Rhino
I don’t eat any sugar at all except for beer. No sweets, no bread, etc
'merica
Take your skirt off, lift without a belt. Forces you to have good form.
Probably help your back out too since you sure as hell can’t use it without a belt on. You might go down in weight to start, but eventually good form = more weight.
Rhino
not using a belt over 450lbs is hernia waiting to happen, I hate wearing belts.
drbigboss
we don’t need one of those RIA in a box firms, we’ll just spend a full weekend of eye bleeding work on this and “get er dun” in a couple days, the ADV part is time consuming but not real hard and you’l crush the series 65 exam with 9 beers in your system and both eyes closed. It will be nice when you get the CFA out of the way anyway though.
Rhino
Apparently, one of the requirements to work for FINRA is a sub 100 IQ
drbigboss
FINRA also seems to require that their employees completely give up on life before starting employment.
Rhino
This was the annoying part, “So I need to take the 65 before I file the ADV, but it has to be attached to an entity or it(the 65) isn’t valid?” “yes” “well how do I do both at the same time?” silence “um, well, you need your 65 license number to file the ADV” “okay, so 65 first then, thanks” I hang up, WHAT A FUCKING MORON
drbigboss
exactly. first time i had to navigate the rat maze that is finra requests i almost lost it. the worst part is they will tell you different things depending on who you talk to and when.
ie:
5/24 9am “so i need to take 65 first right?
finra: “yes”
5/25 2pm “so I need to take 65 first right?”
finra: “no”
me: AAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
we’ll get through it but I’ll be keeping blood pressure meds within arms reach for sure.
halfbloodpope
The crazy power lifter at my gym I was friendly with would always say, “Row like a viking and some day your back will be bullet-proof like mine.”
Rhino
that is hilarious and true! I couldnt figure out why my bench and deadlift lock out sucked so bad, then I started doing shit loads of rows and pulls twice a week for a year, got 100lbs on both.
drbigboss
seriously man, the biggest gains I ever had in my bench were after I started getting serious about my dead lifts and rows.
thetapeguy
Unfortunately one of the worst parts of your diet is the beer, but like me, impossible to cut out. Enjoy Marin brew co and let me know if they have the blue berry on tap!
Rhino
The lady is hoping for the Stinson Beach Peach.
MCPJ
I’ll call that DL a draw at 495, since you did 550 or whatever but with the bands!
Rhino
Yeah, I guess it’s a draw, but I owe you anyway for not letting the bar take my head off.