This Week’s Trading is Going to be Bananas

The summer is winding down and junior at the trading turret is tight — extremely stressed for not performing well while his cocaine addled manager is out in the Hamptons being a fantastic host and overall great person.

The FANG stocks haven’t been working all that well and trading has been listless for several weeks now. I can sense things are coming to a head and junior is on the verge of sperging the fuck out and committing massive funds into wayward idea gleaned off the interwebs.

Here, look at this junior — top rated stocks by Sortino ratio. Your manager would be proud of you if you bought these stocks.

Here’s another idea. How about gold — so cheap, yet so vehemently hated. People get stressed when I ask them about gold. It was supposed to do something, but it never quite worked out that way.

According to Exodus, gold is near oversold levels. You should step in.

Truth be told, this market was tailor made for me. I am on the verge of taking pick axes to the brains of my enemies this week, as my SAAS position roll into high gear and crush short sellers into flat pieces of flesh. The momentum trade is where I’m best utilized, thinly traded with junior tangentially moving around in search of the green light.