iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,241 Blog Posts

This is America: FUNDING SECURED

Thanks to a market moving Tweet, it appears Elon Musk is now going to be investigated by the cuckholds at the SEC. This is the rule that will likely be applied during the investigation.

§ 240.14e-8 Prohibited conduct in connection with pre-commencement communications.

It is a fraudulent, deceptive or manipulative act or practice within the meaning of section 14(e) of the Act ( 15 U.S.C. 78n) for any person to publicly announce that the person (or a party on whose behalf the person is acting) plans to make a tender offer that has not yet been commenced, if the person:

(a) Is making the announcement of a potential tender offer without the intention to commence the offer within a reasonable time and complete the offer;

(b) Intends, directly or indirectly, for the announcement to manipulate the market price of the stock of the bidder or subject company; or

(c) Does not have the reasonable belief that the person will have the means to purchase securities to complete the offer.

It’s all well and good and we all enjoy the Trump-esque black humor of Musk — but one must ask: where the fuck is he getting $71 billion to execute a leveraged buyout of his insane company?

A deal of this size and scale would’ve been leaked through the improper channels on Wall Street and, thus far, all of the highly paid analysts who cover TSLA are highly skeptical that such a deal is even possible, let alone in the works.

ENTER TWITTER.

In light of Musk’s outrageous tweet, people created their own memes, mostly retarded, but many entertaining.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

6 comments

  1. tonka

    In 5 years the SEC will slap him with a $30,000 fine.

    The biggest companies in the world have all committed fraud at some point. The winners just had enough time to become legit before they got caught.

    I think the safest portfolio in the world right now is 100% in Tesla leaps. 50% in $420 calls, 50% in $50 puts.

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  2. joyous__ending

    Musk may survive the SEC.
    NY Rep. Chris Collins is a goner.

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  3. dawg

    We need Sarc back and Alpha ‘ . . ‘
    u

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  4. fryguy15

    Uber is private and has funding secured, and is worth more than TSLA. There is a lot of private cash out there.

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  5. TJWP

    TLSA is a fraud, their cars are shit and try to kill you, and Elon despite his previous success is now imploding.

    He doesn’t have funding. He doesn’t have shareholder support. He publicly claimed both with the intent to manipulate the stock price – he will and should be sued.

    if you don’t think so, then this is a wonderful time to buy for your guaranteed $420/share buyout so fill your boots.

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  6. juice

    He’d have no problem raising $100 billion … AAPL GOOGL MSFT the Saudis, Norwegians, Chinese .. they all would help the Musk out & he knows it. .. done the math in his head and it leaked out via $TWTR while smoking dope, hence the $420

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