Another 400 point rally?
It seems every other week, the market runs 400 points. This is absolute tomfoolery, coupled with fuckery, to see stocks gyrate like this.
Much to my chagrin, I lost several boat loads of appreciating dollars today, getting “skull fucked” in [[SRS]], [[SMN]] and [[DGP]].
To make matters worse, I neglected to cover my [[MON]] short, when it was down near $104 earlier today.
So, the 2nd quarter has officially begun with a mind numbing 3%+ rally, effectivley wiping out 1/3rd of the year-to-date losses, in one day.
With this strength, expect to see a lot of banks raise capital, adding fuel to the bullish fervor. However, in reality, all of the deals will be dilutive and do nothing to help produce earnings.
On days like this, I just want to walk around NYC and throw dynamite sticks at birds and shit.
Final note: Fuck the banks.
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you upset
Banks are shit–i hold my puts and wait….
I jump back in on FXP, and get bitch slapped. I don’t have a mustache, so my upper lip is very bruised.
Used discipline, and had a stop. Sucks, though.
3 400 point up days in 3 a week span didn’t seem possible 3 1/2 weeks ago. Expect the unexpected.
I think we got severely overbought today…my oscillators have been overbought all day, and damn near extreme levels towards the end of the day.
I got to tell you, our only hope to stop this fuckin bull-charge off hitting 13,000 DOW, is the non-farm payroll Friday; but then again, thats pushing it, since we just went through easter.
Guess what? Bull markets don’t come out of bear markets via 400 pt. updays.
It’s complete crack whorish swiss cheese brained insanity.
A little early for FXP. You know those overshooting fuckers in Hong Kong will tear their index up 15% tonight. At the same time, the actual A-shares will drift lower, per government plans.
FXP will be a buy when it wears earth-tone bell bottoms and owns a pet rock… not when it watches Knight Rider and The A-Team.
Mr. Wood Shed, what do you think about the ol’ MACD on a weekly chart for the Dow/SPY? About to break out bullish?
Where’s Brucie?
Second query — you thinking about $VIX calls here? The trendline is right at $22, and you know what happened the last time we hit it….
Big Mike:
Fuck you and your oscillators.
Hmmmm…. the question is… will it be a buy at the the advent of Happy Days, or at say…. Mork & Mindy??
This rally cut deep.
Its Raimen noodles with ketchup sauce for me tonight.
Oh, and fuck Lehman with a giant rubber fist
Guess you fuckers need to go back and read my
I’m Getting Bullish
and my
Still Bullish
posts.
Good times. I love being right.
Dynamite sticks ready, eyeballing those fucking pigeons outside my office…
Whoops,
I meant OVERBOUGHT!!!Don’t be a fuckin sore baby…
FXP vis a vis KISS:
Dressed to Kill?
Alive?
Love Gun?
We’ve already blow through the dark ages, without makeup. Headed towards Dynasty.
Mork & Mindy would be good… Happy Days, even better. However if we get down to Green Acres or Hogan’s Heroes, I would have to re-think the trade.
throw something at your trader
Big Mike:
I throw open flour bags at your oscillator.
Aaahhggrrr!
At a loss for words.
Actually, I take that back. Definite support at Magnum, PI, as well as Green Acres. I’m a buyer at Tom Selleck.
No way SKF stays down this much for long.
Do the lenders now trust the borrowers? Hell no.
Do the investors now trust the lenders? Hell no.
Does anyone trust the rating agencies or bond insurers? Absofuckinglutly not!
Just hold onto that grenade a little longer before throwing it back.
Jake,
1982 bull started with a bang.
What the fuck? Whats with the fucking hostility? Kiss my ass, fucker…I’ll bride your trade servant to kick your ass
down 500 tomorrow….leh mer go bk—my wildest fantasy
Fly,
Pigeons are endangered everywhere except the 5 boroughs. I’ll report you to the DEC.
Bitch.
-DT
April Fool’s Day, Fucker.
LEH – sufficient capital, but raises $3.0 billion. Shorting Heavy tomorrow.
LULU – reports before the bell. They better blowout earnings or else they get the “no vaseline” treatment.
IWM was pretty strong.
I throw open flour bags at your oscillator.
I cast “Level 10 Lightning Bolts” at your goblin! Ha!
another 9-1 upside vs downside volume day. that’s the third within a 45 day period.
We are 145 points from 12,800. Are you fucking kidding me.
Fuck pigeons.
If I was homeless, I’d hunt those fuckers and cook them on my flaming barrel of garbage.
as fucked as today was, i really do like how the “stock price entry points as time-based cultural icon references” meme developed today.
You know, I’ve always wondered why homeless people don’t eat pigeons. I’ve lived in NYC for quite some time but have never heard/seen it before………
what a classic fuking short squeeze. the problem with relying on NFP is that its been know for occasional surprises. this has to be shrt squeeze b/c natural buyers would not be getting in front of NFP after 3 neg months.
Shortest. Recession. Ever.
No. Credit. Crisis.
I. Am. A. God!
What’s the only difference between the NYSE & Aquaduct Raceway?
Horseshit
Chivas, I wasn’t trading back then (I wasn’t even into girls back then), but if I know my history, the 1982 bull started off of a 14 year secular bear.
You think we’re out of the secular bear already?
Because they eat Mcdonalds, because its fucking cheap, because even homeless Americans can afford Micky Ds.
I gave this homeless guy in Dallas a days supply of big macs in dirty change from my vehicles cupholders a couple days ago. True Story.
Mohter market will be 700 points higher over the next 3 trading days. The shorts will get bitched slapped for a few more days.
“Rumor” The Gov is going to start buying FNM and FRE paper-it will be announced this week. Stay tuned.
Fannie and Freddie will ramp and lift the market.
It sounds like Fly is suffering from Histoplasmosis, a disease caused from a fungus which grows in pigeon droppings. Very common in NYC.
nullpointer: where did you hear that meme?
actually you mean psittacosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psittacosis
close.
at least it rhymes
I’m convinced that there is a collective mindset of the entire world that is absolutely gone crazy…. I mean think about it, if you were in a mental institution, would you even be aware that you’re there? Or would you beleive that you live in another land far far away?
The only difference is, we’d all be in mental institutions in a more civilized society…
I think this craziness is pretty accurately reflected in the market.
Thanks Ovtiboboy. I tried to remember the disease from biology class. I found this and Fly may have all three if he hates pigeons so much.
http://nyc.gov/html/doh/html/epi/epi-pigeon.shtml
Jake,
lol, i was a young broker back then with mother merrill in coral gables florida. good question, we might be, but don’t know. what i do feel very strongly about is that if this secular bear is not done, before it resumes, the shorts will get killed. the short trade got to crowded.
We will bring the illuminati doctrine to justice…
Annuit CÅ“ptis
fly = retard
bank raise capital to buy paper, buying paper puts bids in markets, markets go higher, banks make money, banks take turns and buy back stock, effectively making the losers who wouldn’t buy the shit holders of the shit in the end, banks = the house in a casino, house always wins
i would kill to finish out my years in a mental hospital. that’s like my dream. just like slingblade.
You may be right about that, mushroom stamp. Though I would think that they would want to save as much money as possible for booze/cigarettes etc.
Stomp
“fly = retard
bank raise capital to buy paper, buying paper puts bids in markets, markets go higher, banks make money, banks take turns and buy back stock, effectively making the losers who wouldn’t buy the shit holders of the shit in the end, banks = the house in a casino, house always wins”
Yeah, except BSC and the 1,400 banks that went out, back in 1990.
Other than that, the banks always “win.”
Oh, one more caveat, they always “win” when you buy them at the lows, instead of getting your brains splattered on the pavement, buying them at any point after 1999.
So, buying banks before 1999 means you “win.”
Got it.
This article explains some of today’s asshatery … Doug Kass has a pretty big following
http://seekingalpha.com/article/70771-internet-hoax-gooses-stock-market
Chivas,
I got laid in Coral Gables once (after I started liking girls). Ransom (Random) Everglades High School ring a bell?
That Miama (sic) area is no place to raise chillens. No one wears enough damn clothes.
Italian Sports Car — I’m pretty certain that story of an April Fool’s Hoax is in itself an April Fool’s hoax.
But ask Calvin, he had posted it first on this page before (wisely) taking it down and replacing it with an innocuous comment.
(Sorry Calvin, some of us saw it.)
Fucking bloodbath! I am 50% cash and not that short and still got KILLED. It doesn’t take much FXP on a day like this.
Jake,
lmfao, ransom is in the grove, thats where i live. my boys went there. small world.
That article is another reason why Doug Kass is an asshat. I mean, resorting to childish pranks like on April Fools Day, is the ultimate in stupidity for someone who is followed closely by other stupid people in the financial press.
Fresh from a hard day of “bullish cyclonic trading,” Woodshedder stops at a local eatery to hone his negotiating skills in a complicated agricultural commodity transaction. Let’s watch!
I ate a woodpecker once. I was young and hungry and it was the only thing I could find. Gotta take the wife out tonight for our anniversary. Will try to remember not to mention this to her.
I will not get waxed again tomorrow. Instead, I will shit on the bulls. I’m tired of this crap (pun intended).
Cramer is a fucking jackass.
Oh, shit, Chivas, Coconut Grove is even more freaking depraved than Coral Gables.
What’s the one in the Gables, “Westminster Academy,” or some fake hoity toity shit like that?
I was friend with many of the scions of looted South American wealth from them parts.
Well seems like the comment was real — not sure if the financial press clued in that it was a joke or not. Another blog has a bunch of comments on it too.
http://bigpicture.typepad.com/comments/2008/04/internet-hoax-g.html#comments
ItalianCar–
I think you’ll note, upon close inspection of the comments, that most people understand the whole thing is a joke. Note also some of the “linked headlines” — they too are fakes.
No disrespect intended, but is English a second language?
Jake,
you might be thinking of gulliver acadamy. if you’re ever down, you have to visit. you will have a great time.
SKF up $1 after hours, so it’s now only down $16.65 on the day! What a painful ride that was today, wow.
More “the bottom is in” chatter.
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=aMUPq4dc98gU&refer=home
Why didn’t LEH just hit up the Fed window? Odd, no?
…
Yea, don’t do hearsay until you verify sources, fuck you Barry, the last thing I need today is a sense of humor. The reality I saw at 3am is the futures plunge 80 points on the UBS announcement. Five minutes later, they are up thirty.
What seems to be the consensus of the “best” firm that caters to active traders? The most efficient , reliable and economical?
Thank you in advance!
Remember when LEH went to 49 last week? Now that was the end of the depression.
Chivas,
Yes, that’s it. I was thinking of Westminster in Atlanta. Gulliver was Random Everglades’ big “rival,” in a “90210-ish” kind of way.
Wasn’t like those fuckers were about to take on North Miama (sic) in football or anything.
Cubs,
The double negs are pretty volatile. One way I take advantage of it is to sell the nearest calls I feel comfortable with at the end of an overbought cycle. I do this with FXP as well.
Note, the timing is not always perfect. I should have done it again on Skiffles yesterday and thought I’d “wait one more day.”
C’mon, say it with me!
Much to my chagrin!
The Fly:
Don’t want to pick up your loser again? MVIS up 32% in just 8 trade days.
FLY:
Im sure you’re starting to re-think your short portfolio. How can you have as much conviction when bad news (write downs) is seen as being good? Every company that you are waiting to blow up will come out now with a little less that expected writedown and the stock will gap up. Its a game, and thats how its going to be played. Your dooms day theory will not play out and you will be crushed like every other stubborn short that thinks he is going to wake up and make a quick 10-15%% on a short because the company came out and lowered their forecast….not gonna happen.
You will change your position soon. Whenever you are leaning one way this hard, you get burned. Ive seen it many times with you
Oh, did I mention that the bottom is in?
Got a wild hair up my ass the other day and purchased May 50 Calls on LEH. Is it possible that they may actually be worth something come expiration? Who woulda thunk? Anyone know how to get a wild hair out of your ass? Irritating the fuck out of me.
JJ,
nice to see SWC and PAL take part in the rally today. oh, wait, nevermind
Oscillators? Are they like vibrators?
Fly’s not here so I guess he won’t mind if I “take this one.”
_________________
Hank P —
Go fuck an exceptionally sharp-hooved and sandpaper-assed goatling.
HOLLY FUCKING SHIT FLY IS THROWING FIRE BOMBS AT PEOPLE IN QUEENS!!!!!
http://www.foxnews.com/urgent_queue/index.html#3e2841b,2008-04-01
gappingandyapping:
I guess the Fly don’t front.
That’s probably my buddy, Bruce (no, not our Juice-Bruce).
He’s from Richmond Hill near Hillside Avenue and he’s as crazy as a shit-house rat.
No joke. Like as in, “tetched.”
LOL Jake, probably so.
Anyone know a good way to play Cuba?
You fools just won’t listen. The economy is doing just fine. I saw a Mexican driving by my house today, hauling a lawnmower behind his pickup truck. I ran after the man to get him to mow my grass. I offered $50 for an hour’s work. He told me to fuck off. He already had too many middle class clients paying appreciably more and throwing in medical, 401K, and free tacos for life. Then he drove away, giving me the finger.
There are still too goddamn many middle class Americans walking around with wads of cash, crowding my sorry ass out and making me wait in long, long lines to get even the damn simple things done. Until they take away all the cash floating around out there, we aren’t going into recession.
Last I heard, Ben was hanging out his helicopter and raining cash on the economy. So, you retards are simply fucking STOOPID to be shorting right now.
It’s time to get long.
The Fly is God
The Fly is God
The Fly is God
after this rally, i’m buying an apt on the freedom ship.
http://www.freedomship.com/
The Nikkei “melts up” 3.5% in like an hour.
Jake -I am familiar with Ransom in the Grove. Very hoity toity for someone like me who went to Southwest Miami HS. My wife actually taught for a couple of years at Gulliver.
cellshort: that’s funny.
The Fly is God
TC — are you still in Miami? You should go out and get a beer with Chivas.
Or better, yet… a Chivas with Chivas.
Jake- No, I am in the Orlando area now, although I grew up in the Southwest Miami area in the ’60s and ’70s.
Ah, hangin’ with Tiger, I guess.
Still, Orlando’s not such a bad drive to/from Miami.
Next time I’m down there, we should all coordinate…
Are you guys serious?
Read some of the comments on this board. Everybody and their grandma’s pet wild Pacific Salmon are BEARISH and calling for the end of the world. The trade is crowded and over. The tides have turned, if you can’t feel that when you are trading then you really are a bunch of internet leaches. Get your own opinion or start collecting some nuts and berries for your 5 year hybernation with the other johnny-come-lately boo boo bears.
Get long or be wrong (and poor).
400 point updays are the only way to get the markets up. If you can’t fuck with the shorts and get them to cover-buy — who else is going to buy Lehman?
so 400 points up…. dribble, dribble, dribble…
Then set up so other bogus news.
These guys know when to fuck with y’all. Like Thursday before Easter on light vol. … or 1st day of new quarter with fresh money entering the market.
The Fed and their buddies are very good at timing these punch-nut days.
Too many bears is right — but you can only fuck them over for a day or two before you run out of gas.
Just don’t be so quick to get back in — all the early bird are going to get another dose of hurt if they cram back on the short side at the same time. Boyz are probably buying puts right now — watch how this market just happens to crater about 3 days before OPEX Friday.
Au,
You need some Au if you’re gunna stay long cuz you obviously know nothing about bear markets, schmuck!
Employee8,
You sound angry, and like a guy who just lost a bunch of money today…I didn’t.
Relax, if you want to stay bearish be my guest.
Enjoy.
Au:
Go fuck a Romanian mule.
Did it occur to you that the links could’ve been erased or changed Jake?? …
http://www.usnews.com/blogs/money-matters/2008/4/1/april-fools-gag-pranks-financial-media.html#Comments
Dude it was fucking joke on Kass, get a clue.