iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,008 Blog Posts

Asshat of the Week Award: Rick Santelli

Its been awhile since I’ve issued one of these trophies, mainly due to a “severe trophy shortage” in rich parts of southern Manhattan.

Basically, I’ve wanted to give Rick an “asshat trophy” for many weeks now. He’s been unbearably bearish, talking his book non-stop. Plus, he’s in dire need of corrective dental work.

But, that’s not why he’s getting this fucking trophy.

The reason why I’m overnighting Rick this award is due to some blog rumor, which stated Rick had made reference, on CNBC, to “Chinese blogs” being upset over something rather opaque. Who knows?

Considering China’s “free speech policy,” the whole Chinese blog argument holds zero water in the “non-crazy person world.” In other words, Rick believes the shit that is written in the “Weekly World News.”

Now, you (internet leech) must be thinking: “hey, this guy Fly makes a rather specious argument for this award,” considering thousands of people have been abducted by space invaders— who also believe the shit that is written on suspect/opaque Chinese blogs.

My answer to you, as always, is: “naturally, go fuck yourself, in the middle of an opium field, somewhere north of Kochiano.”

In short, Mr. “bear-bond bitch” Santelli deserves this award, ahead of tomorrows job numbers, with all of its glorious trimmings of asshattery.

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32 comments

  1. brian

    I hate when the leeesssman and rick go at it…Makes me want to drive a car full of TNT into them. Shut the fuck up already…….

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  2. newequity

    His agenda is clear cut.

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  3. BudH

    Never say never…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHzLjRfgQqQ

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  4. mrkcbill

    God that is a disturbing picture. I get a good dose of him in the mornings. I’m sure he’ll be on tomorrow morning with his popcorn and binoculars ready for the #.

    I like the new design and format props to you and your crew. I also like how you have the Blogroll. Can’t forget to visit Howard.

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  5. Bison Burger

    Is there an Asshat of the Year Award? He deserves to be nominated for that at the very least.

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  6. JakeGint

    What the hell? This guy is on tv?

    Rick, I’ve got two “trade secret” words for you:

    Porcelain Veneers.

    Assface.

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  7. DPeezy

    Good choice.
    Although I’m still disappointed that John Chambers didn’t get one of these about a month ago, after Cisco’s earnings and his dumbass comments that destroyed tech for a couple weeks.

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  8. Boruike

    JakeGint, your “Porcelain Veneers” comment is hilarious. LMAO. This is a funny article.

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  9. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    Rick is a very smart guy and I had liked him for a long time. However, ever since about late August when I saw “Mr. December Asshat” as he was strolling over to the Merc on Adams and he said to me that the fed’s next move would be a hike after I told him I would bet him a stake from Morton’s it would be a cut, he has turned into some greasy Viking meat eating toothless bear fucker. I don’t know if he has been taking it up the ass from the old men bond traders or what, all I know is this here fucker has changed. In short, I spit on his CBOT post and wipe shit on his Merc rail. Enjoy your treasure fuck face, anyone who lets Little Girl Leseman eat your lunch daily is a pussy.

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  10. alphadawgg

    Fly,
    Whoever the webmaster is, tell him/her that the new format is odd. It’s messing with my sensory processing disorder.

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  11. Juice

    I think it was a tie between Santelli & Gasparino.

    Co-asshat awards are in order.

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  12. Alvari40

    Ohhhh, ohhhhh, greasy Gasparino has my vote. What a self serving, rude SOB. We all have a Gasparino in our lives. So, my lifetime achievement asshat goes to that nasty fuck.

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  13. Steve

    Yeah, Gasparino is the worst. What an obnoxious douche.

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  14. ainkurn

    I think Larry Kudlow should get the Asshat of the Year award. I loathe everything that comes out of his mouth.

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  15. nullpointer

    I agree about Kudlow – I’d like to punch that privileged smirk off his face – man I hate that fucker.

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  16. Alvari40

    Fly,

    When are you going to give the “Big Cock” award to the girls of CNBC? Just asking.

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  17. Richard

    at least he has his own skin in the game. that fuckface leesman is straight bullshit, without a $ on the line. hell, even the fly talks his own book. i’m starting a asshat recall.

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  18. Alvari40

    Richard,

    What is Santelli’s story?

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  19. The Fly

    Fuck you Richard.

    Leesman would punch your eyebrows off for half the shit you just said.

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  20. BOOMER

    It is good to have the Asshats back.

    An award to Santelli would have brought out a slew of funny replies. Instead, we get drivel.

    Furthermore, I have noticed a significant decline in quality of witticisms posted by readers in recent weeks. I used to get one hearty chuckle, not laughter, out of each thread. Now I just keep scrolling, sipping hot hot coffee, nary a chuckle to be found.

    Jake is holding it down all by his lonesome. I think its an IQ thing. We seem to be diluted with brutes and bores.

    What can be done? This is getting sad.

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  21. The Fly

    Boomer:

    You’re right.

    The looming recession has people very “unfunny.”

    Jake is “holding it down,” all by himself, poor guy.

    Someone should throw him a milk bone.

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  22. Alvari40

    Boomer,

    Fuck You.

    Hahahahahohohohwooooaaaaa. Too fucking funny!!!!! That was a good chuckle I had.

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  23. Steve

    Thankfully Boomer still brings the funny.

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  24. mrkcbill

    Boomer- I just saw Ducati at Starbucks ordering a $5 latte.

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  25. BOOMER

    Milk bone, or soup bone?

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  26. Frosty

    FLY where do I get one of those ass hats? buying ZINC this morning…chicoms eat zinc for breakfast, global growth indeed.

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  27. CubsRock

    GME alomst hit $64. This is so fucked. The company is crap and they even guided down for 4th q. Sure game sales are great right now but who goes to gamestop to buy games at Retail prices.

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  28. SaNTa

    “Someone should throw him a milk bone.”

    LOL

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  29. cigars3

    Jeff

    Just for the record, the post you reference is put up by a known douchebag. If you search that site for around the SID show you’ll see nothing but amazement (and relief) from people who actually have seen it in action, not some douchebag making shit up.

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