The Map At The Mall Says “You Are Here”

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No doubt you have once or twice visited your local cathedral of consumerism, the ginormous shopping mall, and found yourself standing in front of one of its directories to find a particular store. I have this theory that some guru of mall design decreed from upon high that no mega-mall should have more than one map per square mile. It always takes me longer to find a map and locate a store than it does for me to actually make a purchase once I find the store. I suppose mall designers made maps scarce to force consumers to walk by at least 118 stores before reaching a directory. That way, the consumer might actually enter a store she originally had no intention of visiting and make an impulse purchase. Well, anyway, once you find the mall directory and fight for position with other people trying to view the same map, the next thing you must do is find the little arrow on the map that says “You Are Here.” Finding this little arrow is not always easy, as some mega-malls are so huge that you actually forget which floor you are on. So you look around to see which stores are next to you to get your bearings and then try to locate them on the map. Often, once you finally spot the store you were looking for, you realize that your destination is on the other side of the mall and on a different floor, at least a good mile away. As you eventually approach the store you were looking for, to buy the special chop-o-matic you need to cook your holiday dinner, you see it — another directory just a few steps from your destination. Shit. Makes you want to, like, shoot someone.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwlQQP4RxqI&feature=related

 

 

3 Responses to “The Map At The Mall Says “You Are Here””

  1. Thanks, Yogi.

  2. I love this one! Nice.

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