Have I caught you just before a meeting? Ok listen to me anyway. Everything you see is a lie—parlor tricks created to fleece you of your hard earned dollars. You work hard, don’t you? Yes? Well let me do you a favor.
Throw away your books. They collect dust and crowd what should be a paperless modern lifestyle. Better yet, burn them. Make them into carbon like a palm oil farmer in the Serengeti. Books are only to be used as weights, for building big ass muscles, to attract a mate with comparable muscle mass, or MOAR.
Then start trading the Nasdaqs with your homie. Then, when the blood suckers go after your book of stocks, you can scrape back their take.
Terrorist sell robots came into the financial complex and gobbled up the NFP rally while good Americans were sleeping. America had to spend all damn day beating said robots back with a Louisville slugger, bear Jew style, only to yet again find more sellers back inside Monday’s range.
Meanwhile, another earthquake, tick-tock mates, hit. Soon a hole to the center of the earth will open and spewing from it will be perverts from Zillow who breathe on you and stroke your hair with their greasy hands.
In short, hells breaking loose so I should probably go lift heavy objects up and down until I swell as wide as a door jam.
If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter
I love a muscle-toned woman, as long as she isn’t super veiny. Don’t put that bat away, Raul. It’s likely to see A LOT more action this week. Que no?
They need to be able to balance a tequila glass on their bum
Z puts got merk’d bro.
Is that gamer talk for zero dark thirty’d?