Whattayou tawkin’ about? I only had fie’ vodkas!
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Actually, Rick Pitino, disgraced coach of the Louisville Cardinals basketball team, was born in Manhattan and ended up going to high school at St. Dominic’s in Oyster Bay, Long Island (high cotton). In other words, he’s not the gomatta (sic)- slinging gangster he’s made himself out to be these last ten years in Louisville, bulgy eyes and dark double-breasted suits aside. He’s actually kind of soft to tell the truth.
How else can anyone explain a 31-point Cardinal loss to the crappy Providence Friars, a team from a city some claim is in Rhode Island, which is allegedly a member of the Union wedged into New England somewhere. Rumor is that the Friars are not named after the chicken tenders crew at Popeyes at all, but in fact a clerical sect known for celibacy, stinky beer and infrequent group bathing. I’m awaiting confirmation and will get back to you when my investigators complete their report.
In any case, I’m tired of it. In seeking some resolution, I’ve assembled a crew of recently released minor felons who will accost Rick at the Standiford Field Airport and bundle him into a black limousine headed for Bushwick, Brooklyn. Upon arrival, Rick will be stripped down to his wife beater tee and skivvies and instructed not to return until he’s brought back a set of rabbit ear antennae from the local Robert P. Moses housing project.
Rick needs to get his “mojo” back, and find that inner hard ass that will terrify these young men into perfoming on the hard court like a Pitino team of old. I’m only doing what I can in the most exigent and dire of circumstances.
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I will be looking to lighten up tomorrow on some of these positions that are up so far in this year. The dollar is rebounding as I type, and while gold and silver are staying upright, I think they are due for a pullback and I will therefore trim accordingly. I suggest you set tight stops on ANY green action tomorrow. 3-5%, tops.
My best to you.
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