BEHOLD the glory and grandeur that is Canada and all that is Canadian!! Happy NHL Free Agency Day!!
Come oot and see us eh? as we celebrate the zipper, 5-pin bowling, the lightbulb, the telephone, the Donair, french fries with cheese and gravy, Lululemon butts, Kit Kat bars, the Blackberry (RIP), Wayne Gretzky, CCM helmets, Mike Reno’s red pants, saying “zed” instead of “zee”, Cap’n Kirk, toques, sour soothers, spelling shit with an extra “U” after an “O” for the hell of it (no iPhone auto-correct), SCTV, and Justin fucking Bieber via swilling high octane beer and cocaine infused Tim Horton’s coffee and eating bacon with maple syrup while sharing tales of pomp and circumstance about beating some American ass (no homo) with hockey pucks and lumberjack axes in the War of 1812!!
Happy Canada Day!!!