iBC Presents: I Want My Very Own Tab

Samsonite Hamburgalar discusses recent events with Mr. Devildog.

Oil is not at $140, yet. Nonetheless, rig count activity, both onshore and off, is through the fucking roof. It should not be a surprise to you to see stocks like Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , Helmerich & Payne, Inc. [[HP]] , Weatherford International Ltd. [[WFT]] or Lufkin Industries, Inc. [[LUFK]] go through the roof. Rig count is near all time highs in many parts of the United States. We are talking about 25%+ sequential quarterly growth, in both oil and gas. What does that mean?

Quite frankly, it means nirvana for depressed drilling parts makers. It is not by accident that piece of shit companies, like Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , Warren Resources, Inc. [[WRES]] or Global Industries, Ltd. [[GLBL]] have gone parabolic to the upside, but by design.

In summary, oil is back. Drilling is back. For the love of stale donuts, Le Fly is back.

I was going to do some big huffy post about chemical stocks, thanks to my recent win in Eastman Chemical Company [[EMN]] . However, due to my allergies making me feel as if I had the black plague, I am opting out. I am not interested in doing a huffy-puffy post. Pardon my acute laziness, as I kick back and die, thanks to grass.

The market is very whimsical these days, totally devoid of reason. I do not care to mock short sellers any longer. I feel bad for them. It’s like watching some schmuck at the poker table, pissing away his family nest egg. What these people do to themselves, via FAZmobile transport and SRScoptors, is a danger to those around them. As such, I propose rounding up all short sellers and sending them to “re-education camps,” where they can learn about Jesus, Santa Claus and Keynesian economics.

My Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] is following the path of the prophecy, and so is everything else. All of my positions are listed, very neatly, inside of The PPT. Go take a peak and see why I am better than you, despite taking a month off, busy doing “The Hugh Hendry” (never a crowd pleaser).

Once again, I was tossed into a murderhole for being long [[VXX]] . Immediately following today’s purchase, the market reversed and never looked back—sending those who are long volatility into deep, umm, murderholes. Seeing that I was wrong for averaging down, quickly and rather amazingly, I took a wad of cash and bought more Johnson Controls, Inc. [[JCI]] , TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] , Eastman Chemical Company [[EMN]] and Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] —all documented through neatly posted and time stamped notes inside of The PPT, of course.

Which brings me to my next point: I am entirely open to the realization that I will be killed, daily, long [[VXX]] —just so long I continue to bank coin in my stocks. I expect to enjoy some big dicked gains in a variety of my positions, none more than Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] . When I, finally, end up a net winner in Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , expect “The Fly” to take a month off from blogging, as a punishment to you for doubting and/or questioning my market hand.

I want my daily 40 Dow points, like this guy wants his fucking cake.

This is what I am seeing:

Financials are weak, especially Janus Capital Group Inc. [[JNS]] , Credit Suisse Group AG (ADR) [[CS]] and BB&T Corporation [[BBT]] . But, SLM Corporation [[SLM]] , BlackRock, Inc. [[BLK]] and PNC Financial Services [[PNC]] are bucking the trend.

[[TLT]] was strong, but now weak.

The dollar, [[UUP]] , is strong.

Tech is mixed. There is weakness in Nokia Corporation (ADR) [[NOK]] , QUALCOMM, Inc. [[QCOM]] , ADTRAN, Inc. [[ADTN]] and Equinix, Inc. [[EQIX]] and strength in SanDisk Corporation [[SNDK]] , [[ARMH]] , Mellanox Technologies, Ltd. [[MLNX]] and Akamai Technologies, Inc. [[AKAM]] .

Generally, CRE is strong with leadership in Host Hotels & Resorts, Inc. [[HST]] , CBL & Associates Properties, Inc. [[CBL]] and Kimco Realty Corporation [[KIM]] . Ag stocks are mixed, with losses in Potash Corp./Saskatchewan (USA) [[POT]] , Manitowoc Company, Inc. [[MTW]] , Syngenta AG (ADR) [[SYT]] and Monsanto Company [[MON]] . Gains can be found in Astec Industries, Inc. [[ASTE]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] and [[ARTW]] .

The most important sector in the market, the metals, are lower today, amidst China weakness. Names like Reliance Steel & Aluminum [[RS]] , United States Steel Corporation [[X]] , Mechel OAO (ADR) [[MTL]] , Olympic Steel, Inc. [[ZEUS]] and ArcelorMittal (ADR) [[MT]] are being taken to the cleaners.

Finally, retail stocks are strong, with gains in NIKE, Inc. [[NKE]] , [[CONN]] , AnnTaylor Stores Corp. [[ANN]] , [[KSS]] , J.C. Penney Company, Inc. [[JCP]] and Sears Holdings Corporation [[SHLD]] .

Regarding the near term direction of the market, pfffffff, the bias is still up.

I bought 10,000 [[VXX]] in the $19.20’s.

Okay, let’s hear about how terrible VXX is, with all of its fucked up contango.

Greek 2 year notes are now yielding 11%. Can you say default? I thought the EU was bailing those fuckers out? Apparently, according to the laws of reason and democracy, it is impossible to bail out the Greeks. The Gods shall not allow it. Think of the austerity plan as some sort of fucked up Trojan horse. The Greek’s are onto us western types and will not allow said Trojan horse into their city circle, for they invented the Trojan horse and know better.

Even still, the market is hardly down. [[VXX]] is running higher and [[TLT]] is up again; too bad I sold it. But, I could not hold onto those fucking bonds for another day. I was losing my mind being stuck in that boring cocksucker. However, I still believe we are due for some sort of correction; hence the reason for my over-sized cash position. As always, I intend to buy your margin liquidation.

Chinese related stocks are getting hit, as well as metals. This is a very big development. Like I said, the market cannot advance without the metals. Stocks like Reliance Steel & Aluminum [[RS]] , Nucor Corporation [[NUE]] and United States Steel Corporation [[X]] are being taken to the fucking woodshed.

Finally, with my money, I like Fuel Systems Solutions, Inc. [[FSYS]] , TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] , Johnson Controls, Inc. [[JCI]] , The AES Corporation [[AES]] and [[MTA]]

That’s the way I see it, right now. With large percentage gains being doled out daily, it no longer made sense for me to be defensive when I could easily trade in and out of The AES Corporation [[AES]] for a quick 5% gain, if I so choose. For now, I am in accumulation mode, with The AES Corporation [[AES]] , TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] , Fuel Systems Solutions, Inc. [[FSYS]] , Johnson Controls, Inc. [[JCI]] and Southwestern Energy Company [[SWN]] are my main targets. My [[VXX]] position will remain as a retarded insurance policy against my space alien magician ways.

While you are over there trying to bet against me, I sit here laughing at you, for you are betting against nothing. It’s all a mirage, Mr. Quixote, as you race towards windmills and talking pelicans. I am still long my entire [[VXX]] position and I still have a monstrous cash position. The only difference between yesterday and today, I am long a fuckload of several stocks that are all advancing to the upside, save Fuel Systems Solutions, Inc. [[FSYS]] .

You need to remember something and remember it well: I’ve been banking coin in this market for over a decade now, with very little disruption. Every so often, I take a break, in order to feed into my many paranoias. But, generally speaking, I NEVER FUCKING LOSE.

Now I can see why you would be tempted to bet against me, since I am vastly superior to you in all facets of life. However, please remember, “The Fly” doesn’t hate you. He is just indifferent to your plight and couldn’t care less about your “new and improved investment strategy.”

As I sit here, munching on a salmon sandwich, crunching on a few chips, I am reminded of last night’s Fast Money, when I could not hear a fucking word they were saying because I was chomping on some chips. I was chomping on some chips then and I am chomping on some chips now, as the mustaches on my enemies faces grow larger.

In summary: bet against me; lose your fucking house. Watching teevee and chomping on chips is a bad idea. And, “The Fly” is going to win again, whether you like it or not.