iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,374 Blog Posts

Boat Drinks and Boat Stocks

Perhaps pirates will make the shipping business profitable again. I don’t know why people love to buy dogs, only that they buy them out of speculation.

I kicked out of BV and ZAGG, due to a line in the sand that was crossed.

I bulked up on FRO, for the win, and MORE.

Comments »

You’re Either Looking Up or Down

I hate when people say “I am blessed, fortunate for the life I’ve been given.” Oh really?

First of all, unless you’re a government hack, you weren’t given anything. Secondly, why do people like to compare their lives to the lowest form of sub-human, the homeless class or welfare recipient? Just because your stupid life is marginally better than the guy groveling for spare change down the block–that doesn’t mean you should feel grateful, as if you somehow dodged the homeless man bullet by a thread.

You get what you put in.

Why not compare your lives to those who travel in Bentleys, living in the Gretzky house, hiring personal assistants off of Craigslist and demanding blow jobs in exchange for working for free? (extra Dykstra)

I never feel grateful for anything because everything I have was earned. Nothing was given to me, or inherited, which, by the way, is perfectly fine. I have nothing against inheritance. As a matter of fact, I believe a good family is one that passes wealth on from generation to generation–just like any well to do institution. I’m not belonging to the selfish “me camp” who endeavor to die poor, so that they can live a rich, full, hedonistic life.

Too many get caught up in the frisson of life, wanting to live to the fullest, do as many lines of blow as humanly possible before it all ends. How short sighted. Do you want your life to be defined as something that came and went, like the summer breeze by the shore in 2004, or something that established a foundation that can last for many decades, maybe even centuries, after your untimely demise?

By no means am I an authority on how to become successful, as I am still trying to make my mark. However, I think my perspective is correct– in that I am always looking up, never staring at the toothless vagrant dressed in a burlap blouse and trousers stained with fecal matter–feeling “fortunate” for not having to share a cardboard box with him outside of Madison Square Garden.

To hell with that guy. I’d rather stab him in his rakish eye socket, than ever feel commonality with his most unfortunate predicament.

Comments »

BEWARE OF MAY, JUNE and AUGUST!

Since 2009, the market has been on auto-pilot up, with exception to 3 months. You guessed it Einstein: May, June and August.

Like clockwork, some sort of mystical crisis with wrath the markets, sending all of the retards, and the King’s men, into a tizzy–swallowing capital gains whole. We’re still in March, so there isn’t an immediate risk. But May is coming– and soon enough you’re all gonna regret not listening to my warnings.

Yes, I have the stats available that could scare you into a catatonic state. But I’m busy right now, so this midnight spook will have to do.

As the market tops out, I expect to hear many of you cheer orgasmically, as your penny stock securities fly to new highs. You will make youtube videos of yourself buying Bentleys and hire personal assistants to iron your socks.

All in one big swoop, your entire brokerage account will go to zero. Consider it a stroke of darwinism and I will be there is purchase your margin call.

Sleep tight pikers.

Comments »

Have Fun in the Mud, You Filthy Animals


I took the day off, after cashing out of most of my positions. Today I sold YOKU because it’s trading like a Chinese internet stock. Maybe tomorrow I will sell ZAGG and BV, both are non-central to any thesis that I could ever concoct.

My top pick, by far, is to be short silver miners. Nothing will help them, not even crisis.

I am going to redeploy some assets back in the market, because I’m not so much bearish, rather indifferent. My goal is to make 2% for the month of April. By hook or crook, I shall accomplish this task. But I can’t do it while fully invested. I need to take a more measured approach, sniper rifle instead of machine gun. Also, owning stocks like BV and ZAGG do not help me to this end. They’re too volatile.

I will be selected 1-3 larger cap stocks worth scalping. I will load up on them, then sell as soon as my goals are realized.

The rest of you can continues to fondle each other’s balls in the mud. I couldn’t care less.

Comments »

Gambling Stage: Time to Exit

All of the good ideas are high risk/reward plays. At least that’s what I’m finding in my searches. I’m going to stop myself from making mistakes and sit this market out for awhile. My internal goal was to hit +20% by the end of Q2. I did 23% before the end of Q1.

Going forward, my goals are to accomplish +5% in both Q2 and 3, then another +20% in Q4 to give me a +50% for 2013.

The stocks I have now are low brow: BV, FRO, HIG, ZAGG, accompanied by an array of old man stocks. My short positions are CCL, JCP and AG.

It’s the end, gents. Time to make a graceful exit now, while you can, else leave in disgrace Andrew Mason style.

There’s no need to search the market for ideas. The ideas will come to you, when the time is right. Rejoice in the gains you have and retire like the slobbishly fat men you all are.

As for me, I allocated 8% of my assets into fixed income yesterday. I’d rather not say where, as it might compromise my disguise. Nevertheless, April beckons and “The Fly” is making an early exit (tips hat).

Comments »

Good Enough

I don’t mean to boast (although I really do), but you should be paying very close attention to SeƱor Tropicana now–due to the sublime nature of his market positioning. There are times when the market commits heinous acts of injustice to his person. Thus far in 2013, the exact opposite has been the case, as he’s been “steadily raping” all indexes for as many days as the moon has risen.

Following my sales, the market dropped off the table, leading some of my stocks to the pig house too. But I’m cash rich and error poor. The whips are firmly gripped inside my palms, speeding at a terrifying pace in a calash as dark as night and as bold as the bomb over Hiroshima.

Ideas will be forthcoming this evening.

Comments »

Weakness Begets Weakness

I got lucky on my USG sale. I think the analyst who said wallboard pricing is biased to the downside is very short sighted. Longer term, USG will do fine. I only sold to protect my gains and raise cash.

Through today’s sales, I am now in a very neutral position, 50% cash, 10% short and 40% long.

VHC cratered because it could and the market is heading lower because it can. It makes no sense to investigate the rationale for the decline, whether it be rumors of an Italian debt downgrade or defunct bank in Spain. The simple fact of the matter is, news is only a temporary condition. What’s important to remember is the institutionalization of too big to fail and supporting the stock markets, worldwide, by any means necessary.

That is the mantra and the official policy of every central bank in the world. Having said that, the markets are permitted to decline 5-15% every so often, to feed the tree of misery with the blood of the less fortunate. I’d be a fool not to lock in my 23% gains and coast until Fall. There’s no reason for me to trade like a wild jack-rabbit.

For money?

I don’t care about money. Trust me, I would care a great deal if I didn’t have any. But my principal motivation is being right–always has been and will be.

Look at today’s biggest losers by industry.
Down

What’s wrong with the picture?

Silver shouldn’t be on that list in a weak tape. The dollar is up, bonds are up and risk is off. This tells me silver and gold are no longer being used as hedges against risk. There isn’t to be any respite given to the longs of silver miners.

Pay attention, as the market is spiraling higher now on another temporary phenomenon, silver stocks are decidedly lower.

I just doubled my short position in AG.

Comments »

Seeking Alpha is Disseminating False Information Again

I have no position in VHC, having sold it all above $35. But this just pisses me off.

VirnetX (VHC -10.1%) is tumbling to fresh 52-week lows on strong volume, as the Street continues weighing the fallout of an adverse jury ruling in its patent suit against Cisco. Last week, the judge presiding over the suit issued a final judgment declaring 12 VirnetX patent claims invalid, and denying all pending motions.

I am not sure if the stock is getting poleaxed due to this “news” release or the specter of a likely AAPL appeal or a major fund sold out of its position. Nonetheless, the contents of this news release are patently false, viz.

VHC lost the CSCO trial, but the patents weren’t declared invalid. As a matter of fact, the opposite is true, as their patents were confirmed by the jury, just not applicable against CSCO.

AAPL still has to pay the piper.

Comments »

“The Fly” is in Liquidation Mode

I sold out of CTRP, USG, ANR, raising my cash position to 50%.

I’m not bearish, per se, just not into stocks at the moment. Some of my funds are going to be earmarked for fixed income.

Comments »