Congressional Idiots

Why are they still debating? If Congress fails to pass the bailout for Wall Street fat cats, the Dow will be down 2,000 points today.

Hey, the GOP doesn’t want to do this communism shit anymore. The way they figure, should the market swan dive to 4,000 Dow, senior citizens will do great in their retirement accounts, since they all own [[SKF]] and [[SRS]] , effectively lightening the burden on the government to support the social security slush fund.

Enough venting.

I am all out of my bank longs. I bulked up on [[SRS]] ; but still hold egregious amount of long positions, like [[ROM]] . It’s stupid and I know it.

However, maybe, just maybe, today will be a washout capitulation day, or not.

In short, I need a breather and will take time to evaluate my next monstrously grotesque move.

This man is a fucking deal maker. Not only does he get to retain his Ag Edwards brokerage arm and Evergreen, he gets $2.1 billion in Citi stock to boot. Wow!

Pay no attention to Friday’s closing market cap of 21 billion. Bob “fucking” Steele is a patriot and a scholar, via slothing around his office and “power brokering” this merger of titans.

For his work at Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] , I am sure he will be graciously compensated to the tune of $150 million.

Why not?

Bob “fucking Steele, baby.

It’s a bank robbery, mind you. Since when does the FDIC actually make money on seizures? Does anyone else find that odd?

Hell, why should I complain? The United Steaks of America is all about creating tightly knitted clubs with secret handshakes. Bob Steele, mind you, does not know the secret handshake. I am sure he tries, whenever he bumps into the CEO’s from GS, MS, BAC or C at the urinal. But, word on the street, he always fucks it up.

People tend to laugh and spit on Bob Steele. I understand he shops at K-Mart for his Christmas trees and The Gap for puffy winter jackets.

What a jackass.

In other news, a colleague of mine thinks the market will close higher today. After all, hell, European markets are down nearly 4.5%. We are American. We do shit ass backwards.

The question I have for you is: why not?

Finally, I am so happy to see commodity stocks eating old fashioned fertilizer, despite being long some. Truly, I would cut off one pinky finger to see Potash Corp./Saskatchewan (USA) [[POT]] file for bankruptcy. I remember the good old days (3 months ago) when I was short POT in size, hoping for death to befall all of their upper management. Good times. Boat drinks.

You can’t win them all.

I always say: “if you can’t win them all, win at least one you stupid fucker.”

UPDATE: Anyone want to bet on whether State Street Corporation [[STT]] or [[FED]] will get an FDIC seizure notice by Friday?

Just last week, I was feeling all invincible and shit, with timely buys and glorious sells. So, with big gains for the year, I decided to press the envelope and push for “retardo gains.” Once again, I have been taught a harsh lesson in reality.

I knew Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] was a piece of shit. Still, I bought 15,000 shares because I thought the market did what I wanted it to do. Big mistake.

I had all of the research on WB that told me they blew ostrich balls, yet I was trying to get cute and scalp a quick trade. Oh Lord, how fucking retarded was that?

It’s the greed factor that corrupts the way people think in this business. Unfortunately, I needed a 6 fig loss to remind me how stupid greed can make a person. Needless to say, from here on, or until I recover some of these losses, trading will be disciplined.

Now, all of a sudden, I find myself saddled with a bunch of bullshit long positions, while the financial system is on the precipice of disaster. How quaint. As you know, I raised capital this morning, via selling my Citigroup Inc. [[C]] and [[UYG]] positions. And, I just sold Synovus Financial Corp. [[SNV]] .

The profits in C and UYG are about 5 times greater than my WB loss; but it still stings. And, ironically, I find myself in the dirtiest of filthiest “coal holes,” via Walter Industries, Inc. [[WLT]] .

Apparently, the fucking Chinese do not produce steel any longer. Therefore, coking coal is no longer imported.

Bottom line: For me, it’s time to regroup and raise cash. This is not the first setback and most definitely not the last.

UPDATE: I am not selling my tech wrecks into this blackhole. The only things I feel comfortable doing is selling banks and buying [[SRS]] for a hedge. Other than that, I am just over here taking hits on Research In Motion Limited (USA) [[RIMM]] , [[ROM]] , [[WLT]], etc.

NOTE: WB was triple A rated. Good job S&P, once again.

Thank you Bob Steele from Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] . Great fucking job running that flotilla into the ground.

UPDATE: I should have known better. This one will go down as my worst trade ever. I just sold every stinking share of my Citigroup Inc. [[C]] and [[UYG]] . I have a very bad taste in my mouth. Fuck the banks and the assholes that work inside of them.

Greed is so good I can almost taste it. It sort of tastes like molten chocolate cake, mixed with raspberry jelly— topped off with lots of powered sugar.

Developing…

About a year ago, “The Fly” started shorting stocks, with high hopes of a banking meltdown. It was fun back then because we weren’t really melting down. I made truckloads of coin shorting a variety of banks, including BSC, Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc. [[LEH]], Washington Mutual, Inc. [[WM]] , and being long [[SKF]] . It was the beginning stages of crisis and there were so many bullish fucktards to destroy: I thought it made sense to bet against popular wisdom. As a result, I was not only right, but exactly right. However, assholes, as everything falls apart in real time, it’s not that funny anymore.

Now, don’t kid yourself for one second. The stooges you read or see on the internet are talking their books, as I am. Believe me, if I were still short, I’d be calling for the blockage of the “bailout” too. I switched my position from perma bear to retardo bull because I felt it was time to fucking shred the losers who relish in the destruction of America.

I love this cesspool and would manslaughter a few hundred thousand people to prove it.

These “skull fuckers” I speak of are not interested in rebuilding America. They want the whole fucking system to come down, in order to make a few bullshit dollars in the market. Regular Macabres, they are.

Some people are afraid of depression and anarchy. Well, let me just say, without massive government intervention, you will get your depression and more. The bill HAS TO PASS— not because it’s good, but necessary. The market is expecting action. Without it, everything collapses.

Put aside your market bias: do you really want that to happen? If so, I have a few Brooklyn “fuck yoos” for you.

Once the government has control of the housing market, via buying the notes, they will be able to renegotiate terms and keep people in their bullshit homes. When able to reduce market supply, economics 101 dictates that demand will catch up— and prices will begin to rise again.

Look, I am no economist. I only play one on the internet. However, I know the market better than any of you morons out there. I am sure there is plenty of money to make on the downside, specifically in industrial and stupid ‘global growth’ plays. But, for now, it’s time for the government cheese makers to step up large and take down a trillion dollars of dicey assets.

Once they do that, confidence will return to the market place and Armageddon will be taken off the table. After all, with all the egregiously armed criminals in this country, you don’t really want chaos, do you?

Be careful for what you ask for.

NOTE: All of you internet lovers, who are appalled by the bailout and are pleading with Congress to toss the idea into the toilet, are stark raving mad. Absolutely mentally ill, certifiable.

Sorry, I had to say that. Unbelievable melt down, two years in a row.

Fucking losers.

UPDATE: The Mets do not suck. As a matter of fact, the Yankees suck and the Mets will win the World Series.

In other news, get your philosophy on with the Krullster.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfFXKxSFmOo&feature=related 450 300]

The stock Gods always bless “The Fly” with egregious gifts of stock market wins, while also punishing him with brutal late season NY Mets collapses.

I made my bed; now I will lay in it.

I am loaded to the gills in Citigroup Inc. [[C]] , [[UYG]] , Walter Industries, Inc. [[WLT]] , Freeport-McMoRan Copper & Gold Inc. [[FCX]] , [[ROM]] , Synovus Financial Corp. [[SNV]] and other equally insane names.

Added to the mix is Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] , [[UYM]] and Research In Motion Limited (USA) [[RIMM]] .

In short, the credit markets are throwing everything into flux—from farms to cars to banks. It is essential that Congress passes some version of the Paulson corporate welfare plan, else all hell will break loose.

Remember, “The Fly” wins all the time, even when he appears to be losing badly.

NOTE: My largest position is C.

I bought 10,000 Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] @ $8.80.

UPDATE: I bought another 5,000 @ $8.58.

UPDATE: I bought 2,000 Walter Industries, Inc. [[WLT]] @ $49.88, 2,000 [[ROM]] @ $46.58 and 1,000 Research In Motion Limited (USA) [[RIMM]] @ $70.92

UPDATE: I bought 3,000 [[UYM]] @ $50.14

Disclaimer: If you buy any of the above because of this post, this will happen: