Reminder: This is the Best Time of Year for Stocks

If I had to choose just two months out of the year to trade it would be Oct and Nov. Since 1999, stocks have risen 76% of the time in November for a median return of 3%. The Turkey Gods are in fact real and trying to impose your bearish sentiments during a time of joy and gluttony is just plain wrong, perhaps evil.

Today Mr Big Shot money manager will drive Mrs Fly to the farmers market for some “fresh organic produce.” I love NC but this place does not believe in organic food. Most of the people here sprinkle some extra Round off on their food after they get it from the store. None of the farms are organic, which is likely some “northern sissy shit” that I’m used to. I suppose I do eat the Monsanto chemicals every time I dine out; but I try to be clean in the way I eat and much prefer to eat at home.

Last week Mrs Fly threw a birthday party for one of my fucking dogs. It was Twinkies 12th and I named her that back when Hostess filed for bankruptcy protection and it had nothing to do with my dog being gay, although I think she is. Largely speaking, Twinkie is a dumb dog and is what people might say is a “dog’s dog.” At any rate, Mrs Fly dressed the dog up and we took her to Home Depot, which is of course her favorite place to defecate. We then treated her to some vanilla iced cream. Since we bought her, Mrs Fly has been cooking grass fed beef for Twinkie and often times her meals are better than mine. Some night’s Twinkie might have steak sweet potatoes and some oats, while I’ll have a burger with salad.

All jokes aside, tending for animals in this way isn’t necessarily a bad thing; but it is a feminine quality, the sort of thing a man would not do. I marvel at the spectacle and do not begrudge Mrs Fly for having a kind heart for animals, which I think says a lot about a person.

Off to walk the fucking dogs.