iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,691 Blog Posts

Markets Circle Jerk Higher Based Off Free Money Concept

It looked bleak for a moment there, earlier today. Coming off a harrowing rape-tape yesterday, markets gave up on a +100 NASDAQ rally and sank fastidiously into the tar pits of hades. Then, slowly, and then all at once, everything shot higher again — thanks to statements from Pelosi discussing MOAR stimulus and wanton depravity. Soon, we will gratuitously hand out $1,200 to the poors and then watch them spend it all on cheaply made electronics and golden teeth.

I got caught with 20% short exposure in leveraged fucktard ETFs have been trading like the wind today, in order to mitigate my losses. I had been down 170bps, but after 8 consecutive winning day trades, I am down to only -40bps. I am only taking two new positions at a time — most gains have been between 10-20bps — fast scalps, because they’re fun and easy to do.

While I’m tempted to get out there and buy everything, I am checked by my staid risk management mind — which is saying now “fucked for face — do not squander a 5% monthly return for a fucking Chinese burrito high.”

The Nasdaq is +140. I’d fade it and do hope it collapses and mangles a great many of you — bankrupting and zeroing out accounts for sport, not pleasure.

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3 comments

  1. bankindamonkey

    No joke, my dentist buddy just showed me pics of implanted gold racing strip caps on a customer’s top canine teeth that his colleague did

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  2. purdy

    At /ZB 173 ..half the planet, me included, will go short bonds ..maybe a trap ..who knows.

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